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Full text of "Inkle and Yarico : an opera. In three acts. As performed at the Theatre-Royal in the Hay-Market. First acted on Saturday, August 11th, 1787"

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INKLE and Y A R I C O 

A N 

O F E R A, 

Price One Shilling and Sixpence. 


A N 

O P E R A. 




Firft A(f^ed on Saturday, Auguft iith, 1787. 





Printed for G, G, J. an^ J.ROBINSON, Patir-noster row. 



Jnk'e, - - Mr. Bannister, Juiu 

Sir Chriftopher Curry, - Mr. Parsons. 

Medium, - - Mr. 3addeley. 

Campley, - - Mr. Davies. 

Trudge, - - - Mr. Edwin. 

Mate, - - Mr. Meadows. 

Planters, Sailors, &c. 


Yarico, - - Mrs. Kemble. 

Narciffa, - - Mrs. Bannister. 

Wowfki, - - Mifs George. 

Patty, - - Mrs. Forster. 

S C E N E Firji on the Main of America : 

Jfterwards in Barbadoes, 

^Thc Lines in inverted Commas are omitted in Reprefentation.) 


A N 



An American Forejl^ 

Medium {without] . J^X I L LI ho ! ho ! 

Trudge [without). Hip! hollo! ho! ho! — HIpl— _ 

Enter Me idim and Trudge. 

Med, Pfhaw ! It's only wafting time and breath. 
Bawling won't perfuade him to budge a bit fafter. 
Things are all alter'd now ; and, whatever weight it 
may have in fame places, bawling, it fecms, don't go for 
argument, here. Plague on't ! we are now in the wilds 
of America. 

Trudge, Hip, hillio— -ho— -hi ! 

Mea. Hold your tongue, you blockhead, or 

Trudge, Lord ! Sir, if my mafter makes no more 
haite, we (hall all be put to fword by the knives of the 
natives. I'm told they take ofF heads like hats, and hang 
*em on pegs in their parlours. Mercy on us ! My head 



aches with the very thoughts of it. Hbio ! Mr. Inkle ? 
mafter ; holo ! ' 

Med. Head aches ! Zounds, fo does mine with ycilir 
confounded bawling. It's enough to bring all the Na- 
tives about us i and we fhall be ftript and plunder'd in a 

Trudge, Aye ; ftripping is the firft thing that would 
happen to us ; for they feem to be woefully ofF for a 
wardrobe. I myfelf faw three at a diftance with lefs 
cloaths than I have when I get out of bed ; all dancing 
about in black bufF j juft like Adam in mourning, 

Med. This it is to have to do with a fchemer ! a fel- 
low who rifques his life, for a chance of advancing his 
intereft. — Always advantage in viev/ \ Trying, here, to 
make difcoveries that may promote his profit in England. 
Another Botany Bay fcheme, mayhap. Nothing elfe 
could induce him to quit our foraging party, from the 
ihip; v/hen he knows every inhabitant here is not onlv 
as black as a pepper-corn, but as hot into the bargain — 
and /, like a fool, to foilov/ him ! and then to let him 
loiter behind.— "Why, Nephew !— Why, Inkle. --(f<7///«^. ) 

Trudge. Why, Inkle — Well! only to fee the dif- 
ference of men ! he'd have thought it very hard, nov/, if 
J had let him call fo often after me. Ah ! I wifh he wai 
calling after me now, in the old jog-trot v/ay,' again. 
What a fool was I to leave London lor foreign pai-ts ! 
— That ever I fhou'd leave Threadneedle-ilreet,- to 
thread an American foreft, where a man's as fopn loft 
^s a needle in a bottle of hay. ' . 

Med. Fiitience, Trudge ! Patience ! If we onc^ re- 
cover the fhip-^. -. ^ • ■ ' 

Trudge, Lord, fir, I fhall never recover what I have 
loil in coming abroad. When my miaftcr and I v/ere in 
London, I had fuch a mortal fnug birth of it! "Why I 
ViTis fa^.ctum. - - * 

Med, Fa6L0tum to a youna; m.erchant is no fuch fine- 
cure, neither. 

Trudge. But then the honor of it. Think of that, 
fir ; to be clerk as well as ovjn inan. Only cor.fider. 
Ycu find very few city clerks made cut of a. man, now- 

■ -■■ a-day?. 


a- days. To be king of the countlng-houfe, as well as 
k>;d of the bed-chamberi Ah ! if I had him but now ia 
the little dreiling-roorTi behind the office ^ tying his hair, 
with a bit of red tape as ufual. 

Med. Yes, or writing an invoice in lampblack, and 
(hining his fboes With an ink bottle as zijualy you blun- 
dering blockhead ! 

7rudge, Oh if I was but brufhing the accounts, or 
cafting up the coats ' mercy on usl What's that? 

Mid, That! What? 

Trudge* Didn't you hear a noife ? 

Med. Y— es— but-^^hufli ! Oh heaven be prais'd^ 
here he is at laii. 

Enter Inkl€» 

Now nephew! 

hikle. So, Mr Medium* 

Med. Zounds, one wou'd think, bv your confounded 
compofurcj that you were walking in St. James's Park 
inftead of an American fbreft: and that all the bealls were 
nothing but ^ood company. The hollow trees here, 
centry boxes, and the lions in 'em foldiers; the jackalls, 
courtiers 5 the crocodiles, fine Women 5 and the baboons^ 
beaux. What the plague rnade you loiter fo long? 

hikle. Reflection. 

Med. So I fhoujd think; refleclion generally comes 
lagging behind. What, fcheming, 1 fuppofe ? never quiet* 
At it again, eh? What a happy trader is your father, 
to have ib prudent a fon for a partner ! Why, you are 
the caretulleit Co. in the whole city. Never loflng fight 
of the main chance ; and that's the reafon^ perhaps, you 
loft fight of uSj here, on the main of America. 

Innle. Right, Mr. Medium, Arithijietic, I own, has 
been the means of our parting at prefent* 

Trudge. Ha ! A fum in divilion I reckon. {Afide') 

Med. And pray, if I may be fo bold, what mighty 
fcheme Ij^ juft tempted yo^ to .employ your head, wheii. 
you ought to make ule of your heels? 

Inkle. My heels! there's pretty do61rine! Do yoil 
ihink 1 travel merely for motion? A fine expenfive plai> 

B for 

10 INKLE AND Y A R 1 C O: 

for a trader truly. What, wou'd you have a man of 
bufmefs come abroad, fcamper extravagantly here and 
there and every vi^here, then return home, and have 
nothing to tell, but that he has been here and there and 
every vi^here ? 'Sdeath, Sir, vi^ould you have me travel 
like a lord ? 

MecL No, the Lord forbid! "but I am wrong 
*'perhaps! there is fomething m the air of this foreft, 
believe, that inclines people to be hafl-y." 

Inkle. Travelling, Uncle, w^as always intended for 
improvement; and improvement is an advantage; and 
advantage Is profit, and profit is gain. Which, in the 
travelling tranflation of a trader, means, that you fliou'-d 
gain every advantage of improving your profit. 

^^Med. How— -gain, and advantage, and profit? 

Zounds I'm quite at a lofs." 

Inkle. You've hit it. Uncle ! fo am I. I have loft 
*' my clue by your converfation : you have knock'd all 
*'my meditations on the head." 

^^Med, Its very lucky for you no-body has done it 
"before m.e." 

Inkle. I have been comparing the land, here, with 
that of our own country. 

' Med. And you find it like a good deal of the land of 
©ur own country — curfedly encumbered with black legs, 
I take it. 

Inkle. And calculating how much it might be made 
to produce by the acre. 
Med. You were? 

Inkle, YeSj I was proceeding algebraically upon the 

Med. Indeed \ 

Inkle. And jufl about extracting the fquare root» 
Med. Hurnl 

Inkle. I was thinking too, if fo many natives cou'd 
be caught, how much they might fetch at the Weft India 

Med. Now let me afk you a queftion, or two, yourig; 
■Cannibal Catcher, if you pleafe. 
Inkle. Well. 

- Med. 


Med, Arn't we bound for Barbadoes, partly to 
' trade, but chiefly to carry home the daughter of the go- 
vernor, Sir Chriftopher Curry, who has till novy been 
under your father's care, in Threadneedle-ftre^t, for 
polite Englifh education? 
Inkle, Granted. 

Med. And isn't it determined, between the old 
folks, that you are to marry Narcilla as foon as we get 
there ? 

Inkle, A fix'd thing.. 

Med. Then what the devil do you do here, hunting 
old hairy negroes, when you ought to be ogling a fine 
^irl inthefhip? Algebra too! You'll have other things 
to think of when you are married, I promife you ! a 
plodding fellow's head, in the hands of a young wife, like 
a boy's Hate after fchool, foon gets all its arithmetick 
wip'd ofF: and then it appears in its true fimple ftate: 
dark, empty, and bound in wood, Mafter Inkle. 

Inkle. Not in a march of this kind. Why it's a table 
of intereit from beginning to end, old Medium. 

Med. Well, well, this is no^ time to talk. Who 
knows but, inftead ef failing to a wedding, we may get 
cut up here for a wedding dinner: tofs'd up for a dingy 
<iuke perhaps, or ftew'd down for a black baronet, or eat 
raw by an Inky commoner. 

Inkle. Why fure you arn't afraid ? 

Med. Who, I afraid ! Ha! ha ! ha ! No, not 1 1 
What the deuce fhould I be afraid of? Thank heaven I 
have a clear confcience, and need not be afraid of any 
thing. A fcoundrel might not be quite fo eafy on fucli 
an occafion; but it's the part of an honeft man not to 
behave like a fcoundrel. I never behav'd like a 
fcoundrel— for which reafon I am an honeft man you 
know. But come— I hate to boaft of my good qua- 

Inkle. Slow and fure, my good virtuous Mr. Me- 
dium ! Our companions can be but half a mile before 
us : and if we do but double their fteps, we fhall over- 
take 'em at one mile's end, by ail the powers of arith- 

B 2 Med, 

il ink: L E and Y a R I c o, 

Jlded, Oh curfe your arithmetick ! How are 'we t# 

find our way ? 

In^Ie, That, Uncle, muft be left to the doStnne of 

cfhances* . [Exeunt, 

SCENE, another part of the Foreji* 

A Jlnp at anchor In the hay at a fmall difiance* 

Mnter Sailors and Mate, as returning from fur^ 

Mate Come, corfte, bear a hand, my lads. Tho'f 
the bay isjuft under our bowfprits, it will take a damn'd 
deal of tripping to come at it — there's hardly any fleer- 
ing clear of the rocks here* But do we tnufter ail hands ? 
All right, think ye ? 

Sailors. Ali, all, my hearty." 
" Mate. What Nick Noggin— Ralph Reef--Tom 
Pipes— Jack Rattlin— Dick Deck -Mat Mail-* 
Sam Surf-— Ten water calks, and a hog?" 
ifi Saih All to a man— befides yourfelf, and 
a m6nkey---the three land lubbers, that edg'd away 
in the morning, goes for nothing you know— -they're 
all dead may hap by this. 

Mate, jDead 1 ydu be-v-Why they're friends of the 
Captain; and if not brought fafe aboard tb-night, you 
may all chance to have a fait eel for your fupper — that's 

all Moreover the youiag plodding fpark, he with the 

grave, foul weather face there, is to man the tight Httl6 
frigate, Mifs Natciila, what d'ye call her, that is bound 
•with us for Barbadoes. Rot 'em for not keeping undet 
way, I fay. 

" 2d Saih Foolifh dogs! Suppofe they are met by 
the Natives." 

Afate. " Why theti the Natives would look plaguy 
black upon 'em, I do fuppofe." But come, let's fee 
if a fong will bring 'em to. Let's have a full chorus to 
the good Pv/Ierchant Ship the Achilles, that's wrote by 
.cur Captahi, "Where's Tom Pipes?" 

« SaiL 

A N O P E R A. ^ 

" Mate. Corne th^n. Pipe all hands. Crack the drums 
of their ears, my tight fellow. Hail 'em with your 
<^ iinging trumpet." 


The A hilles, though chrljlen'd^ good Jhip^ 'tis funnis'J^ 
From that old Man of lVai\ great At hilles^ Jo priz'J^ 
JVas hey like our vejfel, p7~ayyjairiy baptizea f 

*ii tol lol^ ^<', 


Poets fung that Achilles — if^ now^ they've an Itch 
*To Jtng this, future ages 7nsiy kvow which is which ; 
^nd that one rode in Greece — ^and the other in Pitck^ 

Titolloi^ qff, 


Whattho' hut a Merchant Jhip—fure our fuppliii : 

Now your Men of War's gain in a lottery lies^ 

And how blank they all look^ when they can't get a prize! 

Titolloly ^c. 


tVloat are all their fine names P when no Rhino^s behind^ 
\rhe Intrepid, and Lion, look Jheepijh you'll find j 
IVlnlJly alas I the -poor -^oius can't raife the wind! 

Ti tol !qI, &c. 

Then the Thunderer*^ dumb ; out of tune the Orpheus ; 

The Ceres has nothing at all to produce ; 

And the Eagle, / warrant you^ looks like a goofe, 

1i tollcl^ ^c, 


But we merchant lads^ tho' the foe we carCt maut^ 
■Nor are paid^ like fine king-fioips^ to fight at a caily 
Why we pay ourjelves well^ without j.ghting at all, 

Ti tol loly 

14. 1 N K L E AND Y A R I C O 

jji Sail Avaft ! look a head there* Here they 
come chasM by a fleet of black devils. 

Mldjh, And the devil a fire have I to give 'em. We 
han't a grain of Powder left. What muft we do, lads ? 

id Sail. Do ? Sheer off to be fure. 

Midjh, What, and leave our corripanions behind 

" I/? Sail, Why not ? they left us before j fo it 

comes to the fame thing. 

" MidJh. No damn it-^-I can't^— I can't do that 

" 3^? Sail. Why then we'll leave you. Who the 
plague is to ftand here, and be peppered by a parcel 

" of favages ? 

" Midjh. Why to be fure as it is fo-^— plague on't 

" { reluSiantly). 

ly? Sail. Paw mun, they're as fafe as we. Why 

" we're fcarce a cable's length afunder; and they'll keep 

" in our wake, now, I warrant 'em. 

" MidJh, Why^ if you will have it fo^— It makes a 
body's heart yearn to leave the poor fellows in diftrefs, 


Jll. Come bear a hand, Mafter Malinfpike. 

MidJh. [Rehaantly). Well if I muft, I muft (goin^ 
to the other fide and hallowing to Inkle, &c.) Yoho^ 
Lubbers ! Crowd all the fail you can, dye mind me ? " 
• [^Exeunt Sailors. 

Enter Medium, running airojs the Jiage as purfiicdhy the 

Med. Nephew! Trudge ! run— fcamper! Scour—- 
Uy ! Zounds, what harm did I ever do to be hunted to 
•death by a pack of black bloodhounds? Why Nephew \ 
O confound your long fums in arithmetick 1 I'll take 
care of myfelf ; and if we muft have any arithmetick, dot 
and carry one for my money. ( runs off\) 

Enter Inkle and Trudge hajlily. 
Trudge. Oh I that ever I was born, to leave pcn^ 
ink, ■ and powder for this I 




Jnkle, Trudge, how far are the failors before us ? 

drudge, I'll run and fee. Sir, diredly. 

Inkle, Blockhead, come here. The favages are clofe 
upon us; we fhall fcarce be able to recover our party. 
Get behind this tuft of trees with me ; they'll pafs us, 
and we may then recover the fliip with fafety. 

Trudge, (going behind} Oh ! Threadneedle-ftreetj 
Thread !— ^ 

Jnkle, Peace. " 

Trudge, ( hiding J— Needle-ftreet. (They hide behind 
trees. Natives crofs. After a long paufe^ Inkle looks 
from the trees. 

Inkle, Trudge. 

Trudge, Sir. (fn a whifper). 

Inkle, Are they all gone by ? 

Trudge, Won't you look and fee ? 

Inkle, (Looking round). So, all's fafe at laft, (coming 
forward. ) Nothing like policy in thefe cafes ; but you'd 
have run on like a booby I A tree, I fancy, you'll find, 
in future, the beft refource in a hot purfuit. 

Trudge, Oh charming! It's a retreat for a king. 
Sir. Mr. Medium, however, has not got up in it; your 
Uncle, Sir, has run on like a booby-y and has got up with 
our party by this time, I take it; who are now moft 
likely at the fhore. But what are we to do next. 

Inkle. Reconnoitre a little, and then proceed. 

Trudge. Then pray, Sir, proceed to reconnoitre; 
for the fooner the better. 

Inkle, Then look out, d'ye hear, and tell me, if you 
difcover any danger. 

Trudge. Y— - Ye— s— Yes, But (trembling). 

As you underftand this bufmefs better than I Sir, fup- 
^' pofe you ftick clofe to my elbow to give me direc- 
" tions. 

" Inkle. Cowardly fcoundrel ! Do as you are order'd, 
« Sir." Well, is the coaft clear ? 

Trudge, Eh ! Oh Lord Clear ? (rubbing his eye^) 
Oh dear ! oh dear ! the coaft will loon be clear enough 
now, I promifeyou— The Ihip is under fail, Sir. 




Inkle, Death and damnation ! 
" Trvdge, AyCj death falls to my lot* I fhall ftarv^ 
and go off like a pop-gun." 

Inkle, Confufion 1 my property carried off in the 

Trudge. All, all, Sir, except me, 
^' Inkle, Treacherous villains \ My whole effe£ls 
« lofir. 

Trudge, Lord, Sir^ any body but you wou'd only 
think of effeding his fafety in fuch afituation/' 
Inkle, They may report me dead, perhaps, and dif- 
pofe of my property at the next illand. 

{^Fhe vejjel appears under fail J) 
Trudge, Ah I there they go. {A gun fir"* d,) 
That will be the laft report we fhall ever hear from 'em^ 
I'm afraid. — That's as much as to fay^ Good by*e to ye* 
And here we are left-— two line, full-grown babes in the 
wood I 

Inkle, 'What an jU-tim'd accident I Juft too^ when 
,niy fpeedy union with NarciiTa, at Barbadoes, wou*d fo 
much advance my interefts. Something muft be hit up^* 
©n, andfpeedily; but what refource 1 {thinkiug.) 

Trudge, The old one^-^a tree, Sirj— It's all we 
have for it now. What wou'd I give now^ to be perch 'd 
upon ja high ftool, with our brown defk fqueezM into 
the pit of my ffomach— fcribbling away onan old parcli*» 
ment I — But all my red ink will be fpilt by an old bUcfe 
pin of a negro. 


Laft Valentine's Day. 

A voyage over feas had not entered my head^ 
field I known but on which fide to butter my breads 
Heigho ! fure I^— for hunger mufi die ! 
Vve failed like a booby ; come here in a fqually 
JFhsrCy alas I there's no bread to he butter'' d at all I 

Oho I Ttn a terrible booby ! 

Ohy what a fad booby am II 

A N O P E R Ai 


tn London^ what gay chop-houfe Jigns in thsjirevt ! 
But the only ftgn here is of nothing to eat. 
Helgho ! that 1 — for hunger Jhou'd die f 
My mutton* s all Ujl \ Pm a poor Jlaruing elf\ 
And for all the world like d lojl mutton myfelf. 

Oho ! I /halt die a loft mutton I 

Oh what a lojl mutttn am 1 1 


For a neat fice of beef I could roar like a hull ; , 
And my fiofnach'sfo empty ^ my heart is quite f ^11, 
Heigho ! that l—-for hunger Jhould die ! 
. But^ grave without ?neat^ I muft here meet my grave^ 
For^niy bacon^ I fancy^ I never JImll fave. 

Oho / / /hall ne^er fave ?ny bacon ! 

I can't fave my bacon^ not II 

Trudge, Hum ! I was thinking— ^ — - — ^ 
Inkle, Well, well, what? Something to our pur- 
pofe, I hope. 

Trudge, I was thinking, Sir,— if ,fo many natives 
cou'd be caught, how much they might fetch at the 
Weft India markets 1 

Jnkle, Scoundrel ! is this a time to jeft ? 

Trudge, No^ faith j Sir ! Hunger is too fliarp to be 
jefted withi As for me, I fliall ftarve for want of foodo 
Now you may meet a luckier fate : You are able to ex- 
tract the fquare root, Sir ; and that's the very beft provi- 
fion you can find here to live upon; But I ! ( noife at a 
diftance,) Mercy on us ! here they come again. 

Inkle, Confufion ! Deferted on one fide, and prefs'd 
on the other, which way fhall I turri ?— This cavern 
may prove a fafe retreat to us for the prefent. I'll enter^ 
Goft what it will; 

Trudge, Oh Lord ! no^ don't, don't— We fhall 
pay too dear for our lodgiijg, depend on't. 

Inkle. This is no time for debating, Yoii are at the 
mouth of it J lead the way, Trudge. 

C Trudge^ 


drudge. What ! go in before your honor ! I knov^ 
ttiy place better, I aflure you.— -I might walk into more 
mouths than one, perhaps. ( Afide ) 

Inkle, Coward! then follow me. (A^oife again,) - 
Trudge. I muft, Sir ; I muft ! Ah Trudge, Trudge ! 
what a damn'd hole are you getting into ! 

[Exeunt int<^ a cavern* 

SCENE, A Cave^ decorated with Jkins of wild heafls^ 
feathers^ iffc. in the middle of the fcene^ a rude kind of 
curtain^ by way of door to an apartment. 

Enter Inkle and Trudge, as from the mouth of the Caverri^ 

^ Trudge, Why, Sir ! Sir ! you muft be mad to go anj 

Likle^ So far, at leaft, we have proceeded with fafety„ 
Ha ! no bad fpecimen of favage elegance. Thefe orna- 
ments wou'dbe worth fomething in England.— We have 
Mttle to fear here, I hope : This cave rather bears the 
pleafing face of a profitable adventure. 

Trudge, Very likely, Sir ! But for a pleafing facc^ 
it has the curfed'ft ugly mouth I ever faw in my life- 
No w do. Sir, make off as faft as you can. If we once 
get clear of the natives houfes, we have little to fear from 
the lions and leopards : for, by the appearance of their 
parlours, they feem to have kill'd all the wild beafts 
in the country. Now pray, do, my good Mafter, take 
my advice, and run away. 

Inkle, Rafcal ! Talk again of going out, and Til flea' 
you alive. 

Trudge, That's juft what I expe£t for coming in.— 
All that enter here appear to have had their fkin ftript 
over their ears ; and ours will be kept for curiofities — 
W e fhall ftand, here, ftufF'd, for a couple of white won- 

Inkle-, This curtain feems to lead to another apart- 
ment ; I'll draw it. 


A N O P E R A. 19 

drudge, '1^0^ no, no, don't ; don't. We may be 
call'd to account for difturbing the company : you may 
get a curtain-lecture, perhaps. Sir. 

Inkle. Peace, booby, and ftand on your guard. 

Trudge, Oh ! what will became ot us ! Some grim, 
feven foot fellow ready to fcalp us, 

hikle. By heaven ! a woman. 

jis the curtain draws^ Yarico and Wowfki dtf 
covered ajleep. 

Trudge, A woman ! ( Afide. ) {Loud, ) But let him come 
on ; I'm ready — dam'me, I don't fear facing the devii 
himfelf. — Faith it is a woman — faft afleep, too. 

Inkle. And beautiful as an angel ! 

Trudge. And, egad \ there feems to be a nice little 
plump bit in the corner ; only Ihe's an angel of rather a 
darker fort. 

Inkle. Hufh ! keep back-^-fhe wakes. [Yarico coma 
forward — Inkle and Trudge retire to ofpoftte fides of thi 

SONG. Yarico. 

When the chace of day h doncy 
And the Jhaggy lion^ Jkin^ 
Which for us tur warriors win. 
Decks our cell at Jet offun\ 
Worn with toil^ with jleep oppreft^ 
Jprefs my mojjy bed^ and fink to reji, 


Then^ once more^ I fee our irain^ 
With all our chace renewed again ; 

Once more *tis day^ 

Once more our prey 
Gnaftjes his angry teeth^ and foams in vain, 

Again^ in Jullen hafle^ he flies ^ 

Ta'en in the toil^ again he lies^ 
Again he roars^ and in my fiumbers dies* 

C 2 M!f. 

10 1 N K L E A vhP Y A R LC O : 

Inkle. Our language I - 

Trudge, Zounds, The has . thtowit me intp .a. cold 
Iweat. :': - : - . " - .- 

TaricQ, Hark! I heard a noife ! V/owfki, awake! 
whence can it proceed! \_She wakes Wowfki, and they 
both come forward — ^Yarlco towards Inkle ; Woyvfki to- 
wards Trudge.] 

" Trudge. Madam, your very humble fervant/;^ 


Tar, Ah ! what form is this ?— are you a man ? 

hikle. True flefh and blood, my charming heathen, 
I promife you. 

ITar. What harmony in his voice ! What a ihape! 
How fair his ikin too ! (g^^^^g') 

Trudge, This muft be a lady of quality, by her 

yar. Say, ftranger, vAence come you ? 

Inkle, From a far difirant ifland; driven on this c©aft 
by diftrefs, and deferted by my companions. 

7ar, And do you know the danger that furrounds 
you here ? Our woods are fill'd with beafts of prey— - 
my countrymen too— -(Yet, I think they cou'd n't find 
the heart)~--might kill you. — It wou'd be a pity if you 
fell in their way— -I think I fhou'd weep if you came to 
any harm. 

Jrudge. O ho ! It's time I fee to begin making in- 
tereft v/ith the chamberm.aid. (Takes Wowfki apart,) 

Inkle. How wild and beautiful ! fure there's magic 
in her fhape, and (he has ri vetted me to the plac^ ; but 
where fhali I look for fafety ? let me fly, an$l avoid my 

Tar ICO. Oh ! no, but-— if puzzled) well theri 
(die ftranger, but don't depart. — But I will try to pre- 
ferve you ; and if you are kill'd, Yarico muft die too 1 
Yet, 'tis I alone can fave you : your death is certain 
without my alTiftance ; and indeed, indeed, you (hall 
ihall not want it. 

Ink/e. My kind Yarico ! but what means muft be 
us'd for my fafety ? 

larico. My cave muft conceal you : none enter it 
f\nce my father was llain in battle. I will bring you food 




by day, then lead you to our unfrequented groves by 
moonlight, to liften to the nightingale. If you fhould 
fleep, I'll watch you, and wake you when there's danger. 

Inkle. Generous Maid ! Then, to you I will ow^ my 
life ; and whilil it lafts, nothing fhall part us. 

Tar. And flian^t it, fhan't it indeed P 

Inkle. No, my Yarico ! For when an opportunity 
offers to return to my country, you fhali be my Com- 

yar. What, crofs the feas ? 

inkle. Yes, help me to difcover a veflel, and you fhall 
enjoy wonders. You fhall be deck'd in filks, my brave 
maid, and have a houfe drawn with horfes to carry you. 

Tar. Nay, do not laugh at me-— but is it fo ? 

Injile. It is indeed ! 

Tir. Oh v/onder ! I wifli my countrywomen cou'^ 
fee me But won't your warriors kill us ? 

Inkle, No, our only danger on land is here. 

Jfar. Then let us retire further into the cave. Come 
—your fafety is in my keeping, 

Inklc. I follow you— Yet, can you run fome rifquc 
in following me ? 


O fay, Bonny Lafs, 

Inkle. O fa)\ fimple maid^ have you fortn^d any notion 
Of all the rude dangers in crojjing the ocean ? 
When winds whi/lle Jhrilly^ ah ! zuon't they re- 
mind you y 

7(? Jigh with 7 egret for the grot left behind you ? 
Yar, Jb I noy I cou'dfo/low^ and fail the world over^ 
Nor think of my grotj when I look at my lover / 
^he winds which blow round us^ your arms for 
my pillow^ 

Will lull us to fieepy whilft we^re rocked by each 

^} Inkle, Then.^ Jay^ lovely lafs^ what if haply efpying 
J rich gallant vefjcl ivith gay colours flying f 


" Yar. ril journey^ with thee^ love^ to where the knd 

Jnd Jling all my cares at my back wHk my 
arrows:' jo'j ufov^ bib 

Both» Ofay theriy my true love^ we never will Junder^ 
Nor Jhrink from the tempefly nor dread the big 
thunder : 

JVhilfl conjiant^ we'll laugh at all changes ^ 

And journey y all over the world^ both together* 
[Exeunt as retiring further into the Cavc^ 

Maneni Trudge and Wowfki. 

Trudge. Why you fpeak Englifli as well as I, my 
little Wowfki. 
W(m)(lii, Ifs. 

T.rudge'. Ifs ! And you learnt it from a ftrange man, 
that tumbled from a big boat, many moons ago, you fay ? 

Wowf, Ifs.— Teach me— Teach good many. 

Trudge, Then, what the devil made 'em fo furpris'd 
at feeing us ! was he like me ? 

JVowf, {Shakes her head,) 

Trudge, Not fo fmart a body may-hap. Was his face^ 
now round, and comely, and— eh ! (Stroaking his chin, ^ 
Was it like mine ? 

WowJ, Like dead leaf-— brown and fhrivel. 

Trudge^ Oh, oh, an old jfhipwreck'd failor, I war* 
rant; with white and grey hair, eh, my pretty beauty 
fpot ? 

IVowf. Ifs ; all w^hite. When night come, he put 
it in pocket. 

Trudge^ Oh ! wore a wig. But the old boy taught 
you fomething more than Englifh, I believe. 
Wowf, Ifs. 

Trudge, The devil he did ! What was it ? 
Wowf, Teach me put dry grafs, red hot, in hol- 
low white ftick. 

Trudge^ Aye, what was that for ? 



Wowf. Put in my mouth — go pofF, pofF ? 
drudge* Zounds ! did he teach you to fmoke ? 
WgwJ\ lis. 

Trudge, And what became of him at laft ? What 
did your countrymen do for the poor fellow? 

JVowf. Eat him one day-— Our chief kill him. 

Trudge* Mercy on us ! what damn'd ftomachs, to 
fwallow a tough old Tar ! T^hough for the matter of 
that, there's many of our Captains would eat all they 
kill I believe ! Ah poor Trudge I your killing comes 
next. ^tAtovx? ^-/J^. 

IVowf, No, n6— not yon^-'no— (running to hi7n 
ayixionjly ) 

Trudge* No ? why what (hall I do if 1 get in their 
paws ? 

Wovuf, I fight for you ! 

Trudge* Will you? Ecod (he's a brave, good- 
natur'd wench! ftie'ilbe worth a hundred of your Englifh 
wives— Whenever they fight on their hufband's account^ 
it's with him inflead of for him, I fancy. But hoW 
the plague am I to live here ? 

IVowf, I feed you— -bring you kid, 


(One day, I heard Mary fay.) 

White man^ never go away—* 

Tell me why need you? 
Stay^ with your Wowfki, y^^j? r 

Wowfki will feed you. 
Cold moons are now coming in: 

Ah don't go grieve me ! 
ni wrap you in leopard^ s (kin: 

White many don't have mst 


II. ^nd 

24 INKLE AND Y A R I € O; 


And when all the fky is hlue^ 

Sun makes warm weather^ 
Til catch you a Cockatoo^ 

Drefs you in Jeathcr. 
When cold comes^ or when 'tis hot^ 

Ah donH go grieve me! 
Poor W owfki wiil be forgot--^ 

White man^ don^t leave me, 

Trudge, Zounds \ leopard's fkin for winter wear,' 
Snd feathers for a fumm^r's fuit ! Ha, ha ! 1 fhall look 
like a walking hammer-doth, at Chriftmas, and an-upright 
fnuttlecock, in the dog-days. And. for all this, if my 
mafler and I find our way to England, , you (hall be part 
€f our travelling equipage; and wKen I get there, V\\ 
give you a couple of fnug rooms, on a firft floor, and 
vifit you every evening as foon as i comje from the count- 
ing houie. Do you like it? 

^Wowf. Ifs. 

Trudge, Damme, what a fiafhy fellow I (hall fcem in 
the city ! Fll get her a ivhite boy to bring up the tea- 
kettle : then I'll teach you to write and drefs hair. 

Wovjf, You great man in your country? 

Tt udge, Oh ye?, a very great man. I'm head clerk 
of the counting-houfe, and firft valet-de-chambre of the 
drefTing-room. I . pounce parchments, powder hair, 
black ihoes^ ink paper, fhave beards, and mend pens. 
But hold ; I had forgot one material point — you ar'n't 
married, I hope ? 

Wcivf. No: you be my chum-chum!' 

Trudge, So I will. It's beft, however, to be fure of 
her being fmgle; for Indian hufbands are not quite fd 
cotrtplaifant as Knglifn oiies, and the vulgar dogs might 
think of looking a little after their fpoufes. Well, as my 
mafter feems king of this palace, and has taken his Indiari 
Qtieen already, I'll e'en be Uflier of the black rod here^ 
But you have had a lover or two in your time; ehj 

Woivj, Oh ifsj great many, I tell you. 

' ' DUETT. 


Wowf. IFatnpmn^ Swampum^ Tanko^ Lanko, Nanko^ 

Black men-^ — 'Aplenty ^twenty ~~^fight for me* 

White man^ ivoo you true? 
Trudge Who? 
Wowf. T(n4. 

Trudge. Tes^ pretty little Wowfkl ! 

Wowf. ^hen I leave all^ dnd I follow thee* 
Trudge. Oh then turn about^ my little tawny tight one f 

DonU you like nit ? 
Wowf* Ifs^ you* re like the fnoiv ! 

If you flight one* ■'■ ■ - 
Trudge. Never^ not for any white one : 
Tou are beautiful as any floe» 
Wowf. Wars^ jars, fcars^ can't expofeye 

In mr grot, ■ 
Trudge. So fnug and cofey ! 
Wawf. Flowers neatly 

Pick'dy Jhall fweetly 

Makeysur hed^ 

Trudge. Coying^ toying 

With a rofy 


When Vm do%q^ 
Bear-fkin night-caps too Jhall warm my head* 
Both. Bear-ikia night-caps, &c. 

End of the FIRST ACT. 


ACT p. 

SCENE, TJje ^ay at Barbadoes, with an Inn upon 
it. People employed in unlading VeJJels^ carrying Baks. 
if Goods y ^c. 

Enter federal Planters, 

jy? Plani'\ Saw her this morning, |:entlemen, ydu ma}r 
depend on't. My telefcope never fails me. I popp'd 
upon her as I was taking a peep from my balcony. A 
brave tight (hip, I telf jou, bearing down dire6ily for 
Barbadoes here. 

2d Plant. Ods my life! rare news f We have not 
had a vefTel arrive in ouf harbour thefe fix weeks. 

3^ Plant. And the lafl brought 'only madam Narciila, 
cur Governor's daughter, from England; with a parcel 
of lazy, idle, white folks about her. Such cargoes will 
never do for our Trade, neighbour. 

d^ih Plant, No, no : we want flaves. A terrible 
dearth of 'em in Barbadoes lately ! But your dingy paf- 
fengers for my money. Give me a veflellike a collrer,. 
where all the lading tumbles out as black as my hat. But 
are you fure now you ar'n't mifl:aken "i (to \Ji Planter) 

\ji Plant, Millaken ! 'fbud, do you doubt my glafs?" 
I can difcover a gull by it fix leagues off : I could fee 
every thing as plain as if I was on board. 

id Plant. Indeed ! and what were her colours ? 

1 ft Plant. U m ! why Englifh or Dutch ■ ot 

French^ I don't exactly remember. 

yl Plant, "What were the fallors aboard ? 

y} Plant, ! why they were Englilli too— or 

Dutch or French— —I can't perfedly recollect. 

3 /^th Plant. 



ph Plant, Your glafs, neighbour, is a little like a 
gials too much : it makes you forget every thin^- you 
ought to remember. ( Cry without^ " A fail^ a jail 

\jl Plant, Egad but I'm right tho*. Now, ge.itle- 
men I 

AIL Aye, aye ; the devil take the hindmoft. 

[Exeunt hqftilj. 

Enter NarcilTa iind Patty* 



Frejhly now the breeze is blowing ; 

As yon/hip at anchor rides^ 
Sullen wavcs^ lacejfant fiswing^ 

Rudely dafi) ugahijl the fides : 
So my hearty its courje impeded^ 

Beats in my perturbed breajl ; 
X)ouhts^ like zuaves by waves fucce^didj 

Rife^ and Jim deny it rej}, 

Patty, Well, Ma'am, as I was faying——* 

Nar. Well, fay no more of what you were faying— 
Sure, Patty, you forget where you are : a little caution 
will be neceffary now, I think. 

Patty, Lord, Madam, how is it poffible to help talk- 
ing ? We are in Barbadoes here to -be fure— but then. 
Ma'am, one may let out a little in a private morning's 
walk by ourfeives. 

Nar, Nay, it's the fame thing vi^th you in doors. 

" Patty, Why, to fay the truth, Ma'am, tho' we do 
" live in your father's houfe — Sir Chriftopher Curry^ 

the grand Governor that governs all Barbadoes— 

and a terrible pofitive governor he is to be fure — ■■ 
" yet, he'll find it a difficult matter to govern a cham- 

bermaid's tongue, I believe. 

" Nar, I'hat I am fure of, Patty ; for It runs as ra* 
" pidly as the tide v^hich brought us from England. 

" Fatty. Very true, Ma'am j and like the tide It 
** A<)ps for no man. 

D 2 N^f, 

28= INKLE ANi) YAH IfC O: 

iVan Welly, well, let it run as ^du pleaTe ; only i)r 

my fake, take care it don't run away witii you. 

" P^zj'/j. Oh, Ma'am, it has been too well traiu'dl 
" in the courfe of converfation, I promife you 5 and if-- 
*' ever it fays any thing to your difaei vantage, my^ nanie.^ 

is not Patty Prink." — I never blab. Ma'am, never,! 
as I hope for a gown. . I 

Nar, And your never blabbing, as you call it, de-' 
pends chiefly on that hope, I believe. The unlocking 
my cheft, locks up all your faculties. An old filk gov/n 
makes you turn your back on all my fccrets; a large 
bonnet blinds vrour eyes, and a fefliionable high hand-'^ 
kerchief covers your ears, and Hops your mouth at once,;. 

Patty, Dear Ma'am, how can you think a body fc 
mercenary? Am I always teafmg you about gowns and 
gew-gaws, and fallals and finery ? Or do you take me 
for a conjuror, that nothing will come out of my mouth ' 
but ribbons? I have told the ftpry of our voyage, in- 
deed, to old Guzzle, the butler, who is very inquiiitive 9 
and, between ourfelves, is the uglieft old Quiz I ever faw 
in my life. 

Nar. Well, well, I have feen him ; pitted with the 
fmall-pox and a red face, 

Patty\ Right, Ma'am. It's for all the world like his 
mafter's cellar, full of holes and liquor. But when he afks 
jne what you and I think of the matter, why I look wife, 
and cry like other wife people who have nothing to fay — 
All's for the beil. 

Nar, And, tkus, you lead him to imagine I am but 
little inclin'd to the match. 

Patty. Lord, Ma'am, how cou'd that be ? W^hy, I 
never faid a v/ord about Captain Campley. 

Nar. Huih! hufo, fof heaven's fake. 

Patty. Ay ! there it is now.'— There, Ma'ain, I'm 
as mute as a mack'rel— That nameftrikes me dumb in- 
a moment. I don't know how it is, but Captain Camp- 
ley fomehow or other has the knack of flopping my 
mouth oftner than any body elfe. Ma'am. 

Nar, His name again !"-CojrArider,—> Never men* 
^ tJon it, I defire you, 


A N O P E R A. 

Patty, Not I, Ma'am, not I. But if our voyage from 
England was fo pleafant, it wasn't owing to Mr. Inkle, 
I'm certain. He didn't play the ftdJle in our cabin, and 
dance on the deck, and come languifhing with a glafs of 
warm water in his hand, when we were fca'-fick. Ah, 
Ma'am, that water warm'd your heart, Pm confident. 

Mr. Inkle! No, no; Captain Cam ^^there, he 

*'has flopped my Mouth again Ma'am." 

Nar, There is no end to this ! Remember, Patty, 
keep your feerecy, or you entirely lofc my favour. 

Patty, Never fear me, Ma'am. But if fomebody 
J know is not acquainted with the Governor, there's fuch 
a thing as dancing at balls, and fqueezing hands when 
you lead up, and fqueezing them again when you caft 
down, and walking on the Quay in a morning. 

"A«r. No more of this !" 

Patty. O, I won't utter a fyllable. "I'll go, and 
'^take a turn on the Quay by myk\i^ if you think pro-. 

per." ( archly) But remember, I'm as clofe as a patch^ 

box. Mum's the word, Ma'am, I promife you. 


This maxim let ev'ry one hear^ 

Pyoclaim'd from the north to the fouth'y 
Whatever comes in at your tar^ 

Should never run out at your mouth. 
We fervants^ like jcrv ants of Jl ate ^ 

Should lijien to all^ and be dumb. 
Let others harangue and debate^ 

We look wife—Jhake our heads — and are mum^ 


7he Judge In dull dignity drcft^ 
9 In ftlence hears barrijters preach'^ 

And then^ to prove filence is be/l. 

He'll ^et up^ and give them a ffcech. 




By faying but little^ the maid 

Will keep her fwain under her thumh'y ' - 

Ajid the kuer-j that's true to his trade^ 

Is certain to kifs^ and cry mum, [Exit, 

Nar. This heedlefs wench, every time (he fpeaks, 
I dread a difcoverv of my fentiments." How awkward 
is my prefent fituation ! Promis'd to one, who, perhaps, 
may never again be heard of ; and who, I am fure, if he 
ever appears to claim me, will do it merely on the fcorc 
of intereft — prefs'd too, by another, who has already^ 

i fear, too much intereft in my heart r-what can I do ? 

What plan can I follow ? 

Enter Campley. 

Camp. Follow my advice, Narciila, by all means. 
Enlift with me, under the heft banners in the world. 
General Hymen for my money ! little Cupid's his drum- 
mer : he has been beating a round rub-a-dub on our 
hearts, and we have only to obey the word of command, 
fall into the ranks of matrimony, and march through life 

" Nar. Halt ! halt, Captain ! You march too quick 5 
befides, you make matrimony a mere parade." 

Ca?np. Faith, I believe, many make it foat prefent. 
But we are volunteers, NarcilTa ! and I am for actual 
fervice, I promife you." 

Nar. Then confider our fituation. 

Ca7np. That has been duly coniider'd. In fhort, the- 
cafe ftands exa6lly thus — your intended fpoufe is all for 
money: I am all for love : He is a rich rogue; I am 
rather a poor honeft fellow. He wou'd pocket your for- 
tune ; I will take you without a fortune in your pockety 

Nar. But where's Mr. Inkle's view of intereft ? 
Hasn't he run away from me ? 

" Camp. And I am ready to run away with you-p- 
^' you v^on't ahvays meet with fuch an ofiei on an emer- 

a' N O P E R A. 31 

Nar, Oh ! I am fenfible of the favour, moft gallant ' 
Captain Campley; and my father, no doubt, will be 
very much oblig'd to you. 

Camp, Aye, there's the devil of it ! Sir Chriftopher 
Curry's confounded good characSter — knocks me up at 
once. Yet I am not acquainted with him neither ; noc 
known to him, even by fight ; being here only as a. pri- 
vate gentleman on a vifit to my old relation, out of re- 
gimentals, and fo forth ; and not introduc'd to the Go- 
vernor as other officers of the place : But then the re- 
port of his hofpitality — his odd, blunt, whimfical fiiend- 
jQiip — his whole behaviour 

Nar. All ftare you in the face; eh, Campley? 

Camp, They do till they put me out of countenance : 
But then again, when I ftare you in the face, I can't think 
I have any reafon to be afhamM of my proceedings. — I 
ftick here between my tj^ve and my Principle, like a 
fong between a toaft and a fentiment. 

Nari And if your love and your principle v/ere put 
in the fcales, you doubt which wou'd weigh moll ? 

Camp, Oh, no ! I fliou'd a(St like a rogue, and lef 
principle kick the beam : For love, NarcilFa, is as heavy 
as lead, and like a bullet from a piftol, cou'd never go 
thro' the heart, if it wanted weight. 

Nar, Or rather like the piftol itfelf, that often gees 
off without any harm done. Your fire muft end ia 
fmoke, I believe. 

Camp, Never, whilft 

Nar, Nay, a truce to proteftatlons at prefent. What 
fignifies talking to me^ when you have fuch opporj-- 
tion from others ? Why hover about the city, inllead of 
boldly attack-ing the guard ? Wheel about, captain ! face 
the enemy ! March ! Charge ! Rout 'em— Drive 'em 
before you, and then — 

Camp, And then — 

Nar, Lud ha' mercy on the poor city I 



SON G. Rondeau. 

Since 'tis vain to think of flying. 

Mars wou^d oft^ his conquejl over^ 

To the Cyprian Goddefs yield y 
Venus gloried in a lover ^ 

IVhOy like hinij cou d brave the field. 

Mars wou'd oft^ I^Cm 

In the caufe of battles hearty^ 

Still the God wou^d Jlrive to prove^ 

He who fac^d an adverse party^ 
Fittejl was to meet his love. 

Mars WQU^d ofty 


Hear then^ Captains^ ye who hlujler^ 

Hear the God of War declare^ 
Coiuards never can pafs mufler-^ 

Courage only wins the fair. 

Mars would oft^ &Co 

Enter Fzttyy hajiily. 

Patty, Oh lud, Ma'am, I'm frighten'd out of my 
wits! fure as Tm alive, Ma'am, Mr. Inkle is not dead j 
I faw his man, Ma'am, juft now, coming afliore in a 
boat v^ith other pafTengers, from the veflel that's come to 
the ifland, 

Nar, Then one way or other I muft determine. 
Patty. But, pray Ma'am, don't tell the Captain; 
" I'm fure he'll ftick poor Trudge in his paffion; and 
" he's the beft natur'd, peaceable, kind, loving foul in 
the world." [Exit Patty. 

Nar, (to Camp.) Look'ye, Mr. Campley, fomething 
has happen'd which makes me wave ceremonies.— If you 



mean to apply to my ftthsr, remember that delays are 

Ca?np, Indeed ! 

Nar. I mayn't be always in the fame mind, yoii 
know. [Smiling.) 

Camp. Nay then — Gad, Pm almofl: afraid too— but 
living in this ftate of doubt is torment. Fll e'en put a 
good face on the matter; cock my hat ; make my bow ; 
and try to reafon the Governor into compliance. Faint 
heart never won a fair Lady. 


If^hy Jhou^d I vain fears difcover^ 

Prove a dyings /Ighing fwain ? 
Why turn Jhilly-Jhally lover^ 

Only to prolong my pain f 


When we woo the dear enjlaver^ 

Boldly ajk and Jhe will grant ^ 
How Jhould we obtain a favour^ 

But by telling what we want P 


Should the nymph he Jound mnplying^ 

Nearly then the battles won j 
Parents think 'tis vain denying, 

When half our work "is fairly done* 


£///^r Trudge i7;/i Wowfki {as from the Jhip) with a dirty 
runner to one of the inns* 

Run, This way, Sir; if you will let me recom- 


. Trudge, Come along, Wows ! Take care of your 
furs^ and your feathers, my girl. 

E Wowf 


Wozvf. Ifs.^ 

Trudge, Tliat's right.— Somebody might ileal 'erSj 

Ifowf, Steal!— What that? 

Trudge, Oh Lord ! lee what one lofes by not being 
born in a Chriftian country. 

Rwt, If you wou'd, Sir, but mention to your maf- 
ter, the houle that belongs to my malter j the beft ac- 
commodations on the quay, — 

Trudge. What's yourlign, my lad? 

Run. The Crown, Sir. — Here it is. 

Trudge. W'eli, get us a room for half an hour, and 
we"]] co.Tie : and harkee ! let it be light and airy, d'ye 
hear ? My mailer has been us'd to your open apart- 
ments lately. 

Run. Depend on it.— -Much obiig'd to you. Sir, 


Wowf. \V^ho be that fine man? He great Prince ? 

Trudge. A Prince — Ha ! ha '—-No, not quite a 
Prince— but he belongs t® the Crown. But how do 
you like this, Wows ? Isn't it fine ? 
^ Wonder! 

Truage. Fine men, eh ! 

Woivf. Ifs \ all white ; like you. 

Tru ige. Yes, all the fine men are like me : As dif- 
ferent from your people as powder and ink, or paper and 

JVowf.. And fine lady — Face like fnow. 

Trudge. What ! the fine ladies comipiexions ? Oh, 
yes, exaclly ; for too much heat very often diflblves 'em 1 
Then their drefs, too. 

iVoiVj. Your countrymen drefs fo ? 

Trudge, Better, better a great deal. Why, a young 
flafhy Engllfhman will fometimes carry a whole fortune 
on his back. But did you miind the women ? All here — 
and there ; [pointing before and behind) they have it all 

fiom us in England And then the fine things they 

carry on their heads, Wov,'iki. 

JVoivf. Ifs. One Lady carry good fifh fo fine, 

(he call every body to look at her. 


AN O P E R A» 3^ 

Trudge, Pfhaw ! an old woman, bawling flounders. 
But the fine girls we meet here on the quay— fo round, 
and fo plump ! 

IVowf. You not love mc now. 

Trudge, Not love you ! Zounds have not I given 
you proofs ? 

WgwJ. Ifs. Great many : But now you get here, 
you forget your poor Wowfki ! 

Trudge, ' Not I : I'll ftick to you like wax. 
JVozvf, Ah ! i fear ! What make you love me now ? 
Trudge, Gratitude, tobefure. 
JVowf. What that ? 

Trudge» Ha ! thi^ it is now to live without educa- 
tion. The poor dull devils of her country are all in the 
practice of gratitude, without finding out what it means; 
while we can tell the meaning of it, with little or no prac- 
tice at ail. — Lord, I^ord, what a fine advantage Chrif- 
tain learning is ! Hark'ee, Wows i 

fVowf, Ifs. 

Trudge, Now we've accomplifh'd cur landing, I'll 
accompliih you. You remember the inftrudlions I gave 
you on the voyage ? 

Wowf. Ifs. 

Trudge, Let's fee, now — What are you to do, when 
I introduce you to the Nobility, Gentry, and others— 
of my acquaintance ? 

JVowf. Make believe fit down ; then get up. 

Trudge. Let me fee you do it, [She?nahs a lew curtefey. 
Very well 1 And how are you to recommend yourfelf, 
when you have nothing to fay, amongft all our great 
friends ? 

IVowf. Grin— -fhew my teeth. 

Trudge. Right ! they'll think you've liv'd with people 
of fafhion. But fuppofe you -meet an old fhabby friend 
in misfortune, that you don't wifh to be feen to fpeak tc 
— what wou'd you do ? 

IVowf. Look blind— not fee him. 

Trudge. Why wou'd you do that ? 

Wowf. 'Caufe I can't bear fee good friend in diflrefs. 

Trudge. That's a good girl ! and I wilh every body 
cou'd boaft of fo kind a motive for fuch curfed cruel be- 

E 2 haviour. 


havlour.— Lord ! how fome of your flafhy bankers clerks 
have cut me in Threadneedle-ftreet.— But come, tho' 
we have got among fine folks here, in an Englifti fettle- 
ment, 1 v^on't be afham'd of my old acquaintance : yet, 
for my own part, i fliould not be forry, now, to fee my old 
friend with a new fece,— ^Odsbobs ! 1 fee Mr, Inkle- 
Go in, Wows -call for what you like beft. 

Wowf. Then, I call for you ; ah ! I fear I not fee 
you often now. But you come foon— 


Rememher when we waWd alone^ 

And heard fo gruff the lion growl ; 
And when the moon fo bright it Jhone^ 
Vf^ p. faw the wolf look up and howl 
1 led you well^ fafe to our cell^ 
While tremblingly 
Tju Jald to me^ 
. mm^And kifs'd jo Jweei — dear Wowfki tell^ 

How cou'd I live without ye f 


But now you come acroji the fea^ 

And tell me here no 7nonfters roar ^ 
You'll walk alone and league poor me^ 

When wolves to fright yen howl no more* 
But^ ah ! think well on our oldcell^ 
Where tremblingly 
Tou kifs^dpoor me-^ 
Perhaps you' II fayr.^^dearWowM tell^ 

How can I live without ye ? . 

^ [Exit Wmjki. 

drudge. Eh ! oh I my mailer's talking to fomebody 
®n the qiiay : who have we here ! 


Enter Fir ft Planter. 

Plant, Hark'ee, young man! Is that young Indian 
of your's going to our market? 

'Trudge, Not (lie — fhe never went to market in all 
her life. 

Plant, I mean is fhe for our fale of flaves? Our 
Black Fair? 

Trudge, A Black Fair! Ha! ha! ha!. You hold 
it on a brown green, I fuppofe. 

Plant, She's your llave, I take it ? 

Trudge, Yes j and Vm her humble fervant, I take it.. 

Plant, Aye, aye, natural enougii ai fea.— But at how 
much do you value her? 

Trudge, Juft as much as fhe has fav'd me— My own 

Pla72t, Pfhaw ! you mean to fell her ? 

Trudge, [Staring) Zounds! what a devil of a feU 
low ! Sell Wows ! — my poor, dear, dingy wife ! 

Plant. Come, come, I've heard your ftory from the 
fhip.— Don't let's haggle; I'll bid as fair as any tradei^ 
amongft us: But no tricks upon travellers, young man, 
to raife your price.— Your wife, indeed! Why, fhe's 
no Chriftian? 

Trudge. No but I am ; fo I fhall do as I'd be done 
by, Mafter Black-Market : and, if youv/ere a good one 
yourfelf, you'd know, that fellow feeling for a poor body, 
who wants your help, is the nobleft mark of our religion, - 
—I wou'dn't be articled clerk to fuch a fellow for the 

Plant, Hey-day! The booby's in love with her! 
Why, fure friend, you wou'd not live here with a Black? 

Trudge, Plague on't; there it is. I fhall be laugh'd 
out of my honefty, here. — But you may be jogging, 
friend ! I may feel a little queer, perhaps, at fhewing 
her face— but, dam'me, if ever I do any thing to make 
me afham'd of fhewing my own. 

Plant. Why, I tell you, her very complexion. 

Trudge, Rot her complexion.— -I'll tell you what, 
Mr. Fair Trader: If your head and heart were to change 



places, Fve a notion you'd be as black in the face as an 

Plant. P(haw ! The fellow's a fool— a rude rafcal — 
he ought to be fent back to the favages again. He's not 
fit to live among us Chriitians. \^Exit Planter. 

Trudge, Chriftians ! ah ! tender fouls they are to 
be fure." 


American Tune« 

ChriJItans are fo good^ they fay, 

i'ender fouls as e^er can be I 
Let them credit it who may ; 

What thefre made of let us fee, 


Chriflian drover s.^ charming trade / 

Who fo carefid cattle drive ; 
And the tender Chriflian maid^ 

Sweetly Jkinning eels ali'-js. 


" Tender tonijb dames who take 

Whip in hand^ and drive like males^ 
Have their ponies nick'd — to jnake 
The pretty creatures cock their tails, 


Chrijlian hoys will Jhy at coc^Sy 

Worry dogs^ hunt cats, kill jlies'y 
Chrij?ian Lords zuill learn to box^ 

And give their noble friends black ry^i." 

Oh, here he is at laft. 



^nUr inkle, and another Planter, 

Inkle. Nay, Sir, I underfland your cuftoms well: 
your Indian markets are not unknown to me. 

Plant. And, as you feem to underftand bufmefs, 
' I need not tell you that difpatch is the foul of it. Her 
name you fay is — 

Inkle. Yarico : But urge this no more, I beg you. 
I muft not liften to it. For to fpeak freely, her anxious 
care of me demands, that here,— though here it may 
feem ftrange, — I (hould avow my love for her. 

Plant. Lord help you, for a merchant!— " What a 

pretty figure you would cut upon Change"--It's the 
firft time I ever heard a trader talk of love; except in- 
deed the love of trade, and the love of the Sweet Mollyy 
my (hip. 

Inkle. Then, Sir, you cannot feel my fituation. 

Plant. Oh yes, I can ! We have a hundred fuch 
cafes j uft after a voyage ; but they never laft long on land. 
It's amazing how conftant a young man is in a fhip ! 
But, in two words. Will you difpofe of her, or no? 

Inkle. In two words then, meet me here at noon, and 
we'll fpeak further on this fubject: and left you think 
I trifle with your bufmefs, hear why I wifh this paufe. 
Chance threw me, on my palFage to your ifland, among 
a favage people. Deferted, — defencelefs, — cutoff from 
my companions,— my life at ftake— to this young crea- 
ture I owe my prefervation; — fhe found me, like a dying 
bough, torn from its kindred branches j which, as it 
droop'd, (he moiften'd with her tears. 

Plant. Nay, nay, talk like a man of this world. 

Inkle. Your patience. — And yet your interruption 
goes to my prefent feelings; for on our fail to this your 
ifland-— the thoughts of time mifpent— doubt — fears — 
or call it what you will — have much perplex'd me j 
and as your fpires arofe, reflections ftill rofe with them ; 
for here, Sir, lie my interefts, great connections, and other 
weighty matters— -which now I need not mention — 

Plant. But which her prefence here will mar» 



Inkle. Even fo— -And yet the gratitude I owe her I 

Plant. Pfhaw! So becaufe fhe prefervM your life, 
your gratitude is to make you give up all you have to 
live upon. . . . /jv,^ 

Inkle. Why in that light indeed — This never ftrucfc 
me yet. I'll think on't. 

Plant. Aye, aye^ do fo— -Why what return can the 
wench wifh more than taking her from a wild, idle, fa- 
vage people, and providing for her, here, with reputable 
hard work, in a genteel, polifhed, tender, chriftian 

Inkle. Well, Sir, at noon — 

Plant, ril meet you---but remember, young gentle- 
man, you mult get her ofF your hands — you mull in*^ 
(deed. — I fhall have her a bargain, I fee that---youc; 
fervant! — Zounds how late it is— -but never be put out 
of your way for a woman — I muft run— -my wife will 
play the devil with me for keeping breakfaft. \_Exit, 

Inkle, Trudge. 

Trudge. Sir 1 

Inkle. Have you provided a proper apartment ? 

Trudge. Yes, Sir, at the Crown here; a neat, 
fpruce room they tell me. You have not feen fuch a 
convenient lodging this good while I believe. 

Inkle. Are there no better inns in the town? 

Trudge. Um!~— Why there's the • Lion, I hear^ 
and the Bear, and the Boar-— but we faw them at the 
door of all our late lodgings, and found but bad accom- 
modations within, Sir. 

Inkle. Well, run to the end of the quay, and con- 
duel Yarico hither. The road is ftraight before you ; 
You can't mifs it. 

Trudge. Very well, Sir. What a iine thing it is to 
turn one's back on a mafter, without running into a 
wolfs belly! One can follow one's nofe on a melTage 
here, and be fure it won't be bitofF by the way. [Exitt, 

Inkle. Let me relleft a little. " This honeft planter coun- 
"cils v/ell." Part v/ith her---" What is there in it which 

cannot eafily be juftified?" Juftified I— " Pfliaw" — 
My intereft, honour, engagements to NarcilTa, all de- 
mand it. My father's precepts too-— I can remember^ 
3 when 

A N OPERA. 4t 

when I was a boy, what pains he took to mould me ! — 
Schooled me from morn to night— and ftill the burthen of 
his fong was— Prudence ! Prude'ice^ TJiomas, and you*Jl 
rife.—- Early he taught me numbers; which he faid— and 
he faid rightly — wou'd give me a quick view of lofs and 
profit; and banifh from my mind thofe idle impulfes of 
paffion, which mark young thoughtlefs fpendthrifts. 
His maxims rooted in my heart, and as I grew — they 
grew ; till I was reckoa'd, among our friends, a fteady, 
fober, folid, good young man; and all the neighbours 
caird me the prudent Mr. Tho?nas, And fhall I now, at 
once, kick down the character, which I have raised fo wa^ 
rily?-— Part with her,— fell her," —The thought once 
ftruck me in our cabin, as (he lay lleeping by me; but, in 
ker numbers, fhe paft her arm around me, murmurM a 
bleffing on my name, and broke my meditations* 

Enter Yarico and Trudge. 
Tar. My Love! 

Trudge. 1 have been fhewing her all the wigs and 
bales of goods we met on the quay, Sir. 

Tar. Oh ! I have feafted my eyes on wonders. 

Trudge. And Til go feaft on a flice of beef, in the inn 
here. [Exit. 

Tar. My mind has been fo bufy, that I almofl: for^ 
got even you. I wifh you had ftaid with me— You wou'd 
have feen fuch fights ! 

JnJde. Thof^ fights are grown familiar to me^ Yarico* 

Tar. And yet I wifh they were not — You might 
partake my pleafures--*but now again^ methinks, I will 
not wifh fo--*for with too much ga2:ing, you might ne- 
gledl: poor Tarico. 

Inkle. Nay, nay, my care is ftill for you. 

Taf. Vm fure it is: and if I thought it was not, 
Fd tell you tales about our poor, old, grot— -Bid you re- 
member our Palm-tree near the brook, where in the lhade 
yQ\x often ftretched yourfelf, while I woujd take your head 

F upon 


upon my lap, and fing rriy love to fleep. I know 
love me then. 


Our grotto was the fuueeteft place f 

Ihe bending bows^ ivith fragrance blowings 

Would check the brook's hnpetuous pace^ 
Which mur7nur'*d to be Jiopt from flowing, 

'Twas there we ?neij and gazed our filU 

Ah I think on this^ and love ?ne JiilU 


'Twas then ?ny bofo?n firj'J kneiv fear^ 
— Pear^ to an Indian maid a (Iranger-^ 
The war fong^ arrows^ hatchet^ fpear^ 
All warned me of my lover's danger* 
For him did cares my bofom fill ; 
Jh I think on this^ and love i?ieJliU, 


*'*'For him^ by day^ with care conccaVd^ 

"T^? fe arch for food I climb' d the mountain 'y 

^^And when the night no forjn reveal' d^ 
^^focund we fought ihe bubbling fountain* 

^' Then^ then vjoidd joy my bofom fll ; 

''^Ahl think on this^ and love /ne jlilL*^ [Exeunt, 

^SCENE, An apartment in the houfe of Chriftopher 


Enter Sir Chriilopher and Medium. 

Sir Chr, I tell you, old Medium, you are all wrong* 
Plague on vour doubts ! Inkle Jl)all have my Narcifia. 


A N O P E R A. 43 

Poor fellow ! I dare fay he's finely chagrined at this tem- 
porary parting — Eat up with the blue devils, I warrant. 

Med. Eat up by the black devils, I warrant j for I 
left him in hellilh hungry company. 

Sir. Chr. Pfhaw ! he'll arrive with the next veflel, 
depend on't— befides, have I not had this in view ever 
fmce they were children ? I muft and will have it fo, I 
tell you. Is not it, as it were, a marriage made above I 
They Jhallmett^ Vm pofitive. 

Med. Shall they? Then they mud meet where the 
marriage was made for hang me, if I think it will ever 
happen below. 

Sir Chr. Ha I— and if that is the cafe— hang me, 
if I think you'll ever be at the celebration of it. 

Med. Yet, let me tell you. Sir Chriltopher Curry, 
my chara£ler is as unfullied as a fheet of whi;e paper. 

Sir Chr. Well faid, old fool's-cap ! and it's as mere 
a blank as a fheet of white paper, It bears the traces 

of neither a bad or a good hand upon it ! Zounds ! I 
" had rather be a walking libel on honefty, than fit down 
" a blank in the library of the world. 

" Med. Well, it is not for me to boaft of virtues : 

That's a vice I never give into. 

" Sir Chr. Your virtues ! zounds, what are they ? 

" Med. I am not addicted to paffion— that at leaf!:, 
« Sir Chriftopher-^-'* 

Sir Chr. Is like all your other virtues— A negative 
one. You are honefl:, old Medium, by comparifon, jufl 
as a fellow fentenc'd to tranfportation is happier than his 
companion condemned to the gallows— Very worthy, 
becaufe you are no rogue ; " a good friend, becaufe yoa 
re/erbear malice Tender hearted, becaufe you never 
go to fires and executions ; and an affedlionate father and 
hufband, becaufe you never pinch your children, or 
kick your wife out of bed. 

Med. And that, as the world goes, is more than every 
man can fay for himfelf. Yet, fince you force me to 
fjTcak, my pofitive qualities — but, no matter — you re- 
member me in London and know, there was fcarcely 
F 2 ''a laud- 


a laudable inftitution in town, without my name in the 
lift. Hav'n't I given more tickets to recommend the 
lopping ofF legs than any Governor of our Hofpital I 
" and^' didn't I as Member of the Humane Society, 
bring a man out of the New River, who, it was after- 
wards found, had done me an injury ?. 

Sir Chr, And, dam'me, If I wou'd not kick any man 
into the New River that had done me an injury. There's 
the difference of our honefty. Oons ! if you want to be 
an honeft fellow, zdt from the impulfe of nature. Why, 
you have no more gall than a pigeon. 

" Med. That, I think, is pretty evident in my pri- 
vate life. ---Patience, patience you muft own, Sir 
Chriftopher, is a virtue. And I have fat and feen my 
beft friends abus'd, with as much quiet patience as any 
Chriftian in Chriftendom. 

Sir Ghr. And I'd quarrel with any man, that 
" abus'd my friend in piy company. Offending my ears 
" is as bad as boxing them." 

Med, "Ha!" You're always fohafty; amongft the 
hodge-podge of your foibles, pafTion is always predomi- 

Sir Chr. So much the better.—" A natural man, 

unfeafoned with paflion, is as uncommon as a difh of 
" hodge-podge without pepper \ and devilifli infipid too, 

old Medium."— Foibles, quotha ? foibles are foils that 
" give additional luftre to the gems ©f virtue. You 
have not fo many foils as I, perhaps. 

Med. And, what's more, I don't want 'em, Sir 
Chriftopher, I thank you. 

Sir Chr. Very true ; for the devil a gem have you ' 
to fet ofFwith 'em. 

Med. Well, well ; I never mention error- ; that, I 
flatter myfelf, is no difagreeable quality.— It don't be- 
come me to fay you are hot. 

Sir Chr, 'Sblood ! but it does become you : it be-r 
comes every man, efpecially an Englifhman, to fpeak^ ^"^ 
the didatss of his heart. 


A N O P E R A. 4S 


ghe me your plain dealing FeUow:^ 
" TVho never from honejfy Jhrink ; 
Not thinking on all they Jhould tell uSy 
But telling us ail that they think. 


" ^Truth from man flows like wine- from a lolile^ 

" His free fpoken hearfs a full cup ; 
" But^ when truth flicks haf way in the throttle^ 
Man^s worfe than a bottle cork'd up. 


" Complaifance^ Is a Gingerbread creatur e 
" Us'd for JheWy like a tvatch^ by each fpark ; 
But truth is a golden repeater, 
" That fets a man right in the dark.^^ 

Med, But fuppofe his heart di£lates to any one to 
" knock up your friend, Sir Chriftopher ? 

^' Sir Chr, Eh !— why— then it becomes me to 
" knock him down. 

" Med, Mercy on us ! If that was the confequence 
*' of fcandal in England now-a-days, all our fine gentle- 
men wou'd cut each others throats over a bottle ; and, 
if extended to the card tables, our routs wou'd be 
fuller of black eyes, than black aces." 

Enter Servant. 

Servl An Englifh vefTel, Sir, is juft arriv'd in the 

Sir Chr, A vefTel ! Odd's my life!~.Now for the 
news— If it is but as I hope — Any difpatches ? 

Serv, This letter, Sir, brought by a failor from the 
quay, . [Exit. 


" Sir Chr, Now for it ! IF Inkle is but g^nongfl: 
" em — Zounds ! I'm all in a flutter ; my hand fhakes 
like an afpin leaf ; and you, you old fool, are as ftitF 
and fteady as an oak. Why ar'n't you all tiptoe— 

" all nerves ? ^ , , : . 

" Med, Well, read, Sir Chriftopher." ,,ogu 
Sir Chr. (opening the letter.) Huzza! her^jj^nl^ 
He's fafe— fafe and found at Barbadoes. ; bbio[. 

(Reading.) -Sir^ 

My father^ Mr, Inkle is juft arrived in your harbour. 
Here, read, read ! old Medium — 

Med, (Reading.) Vm'-'-Tour harbour ',^~^we were 
taken up by an Englijh vejjel on the i^th ult® . He only waits 
till I have puffed his hair^ to pay his refpe5is to you^ and 
Mifs Narcijja : In the mean ti?ne^ he has ordered mi ta 
brufo up this letter for your honour from 

Your humble Servant^ to command^ 

Timothy Trudge. 

Sir Chr. Hey day ! Here's a fllle ! the voyage has 
jumbled the fellow's brains out of their places ; the wa- 
ter has made his head turn round. But no matter ; mine 
turns round, too. I'll go and prepare Narcifla directly ; 
they fhall be married, flap-dafh, as foon as he comes 
from the quay. From Neptune to Hymen ; from the 
hammock to the bridal bed — Ha ! old boy ! 

Med. Well, well \ don't flurry yourlelf — you're fo 
hot ' 

Sir Chr. Hot ! blood, an't I in the Weft Indies ! 
An't I Governor of Barbadoes ? He fhall have her as 
foon as he fets his foot on fhore. " But plague on't, he's ^ 
fo flow. — "She fhall rife to him Like Venus out of the 
fea. His hair puff'd ! He ought to have been puffing, 
here, out of breath, by this time. 

Med. Very true j but Venus's hufband is always fup- 
pofed to be lame, you know. Sir Chriftopher. 



Sir Chr, Well, now do, my good fellow, run down 
to the (hore, and fee what detains him . [ Hurrying hi?n off. 
Med. Well, well; I will, I will. [Exit, 
Sir Chr, In the mean time, Til get ready Narcilfa, 
and all {hall be concluded in a fecond. My heart's fee 
upon it. — Poor fellow ! after all his rumbles, and 
tumbles, and jumbles, and fits of defpair — I fhallbe re- 
joiced to fee him. I have not feen him fmce he was 
that high. — But, zounds ! he's fo tardy ! 

Enter Servant. 

Serv, A (Irange Gentleman, Sir, come from the 
quay, defires to fee you. 

Sir Chr. From the quay? Od's my life! — 'Tis 
he — 'Tis Inkle! Shewhimup, directly. [Exit Servant,) 
The rogue is expeditious after all. — Pm fo happy. 

Enter Campley. 

My dear Fellow ! [Embracing him—Jhakes hands.'] I'm 
rejoic'd to fee you. Welcome ! welcome here, with all 
my foul I 

Camp, This reception, Sir Chriftopher, is beyond 
my warmeft wifhes — Unknown to you 

Sir Chr. Aye, aye ; we (hall be better acquainted 
by and by. Well, and how, eh! Tell me ! — But old 
Medium and I have talk'd over your affair a hundred 
times a day, ever fmce NarcifTa arriv'd. 

Camp. You furprize me ! Are you then really ac- 
quainted with the whole affair ? 

Sir Chr. Every tittle. 

Camp. And, can you. Sir, pardon what Is pall?— 
Sir Chr. Pooh! how could you help it? 
Camp. Very true— failing in the fame {hip-— and— 
Sir Chr. Aye, aye j but we have had a hundred con- 
je6tures about you. Your defpair and diflrefs, and all 

" that— Your's muil have been a damn'd fituation, to 

" fay the truth. 

Camp. " Cruel indeed. Sir Chriflopher ' and I 
flatter myfelf will move your compalTion. I have 

" been 

48 INKLE A N p y A R IX 

*^feh 'almoft inclin'd to defpair, indeed, as you Hi^j*^' 

—when you confider the paft ftate of my ihilidi^i- 
the black profpect before me. 

Sir Chr. Ha ! ha ! Black enough, I dare fay. 

Camp, The difficulty I have felt in bringing myfelf 
face to face to you. 

Sir Chr, That I am convinc'd of— but I knew y6u 
wou'd come the firft opportunity. ' 

Camp, Very true : yet the diftance between the Grip- ^ 
vernor of Barbadoes and myfelf. [Bowing.^ ^ ' ' '"'^ 

Sir Chr. Yes a devilifh way afunfei 

" Camp, Granted, Sir : which has diftrefs'd mc with" 
the cruelleft doubts as to our meeting. ' v"» 

Sir Chr, It was a tofs up. ' ' ' * 

Camp, The old Gentleman feeins xfevilffli kind,-— 
Now. to foften him» \^Afide'] Perhaps, . Srr,~ in yoiii^ 
younger days, you may have been in fame fic- 
tion yourfelf. - • _ ' -' '-^ ^ 

Sir Chr, Who ? I! 'fblood f ltd, never in my life. 

Camp, J wifh you had, with all my foul. Sir Chr|{w^ 
topRer? - i""' ^ 

Sir Chr, Upon my foal, Sir, I zih'Wty^^i^'i' 
11 ge d to you . ( Bowing ) 

^Camp.^ .,As what I now mention might have greatej^ 
weight with you. 

Sir Chr, Pooh ! prithee I I tell you I pitied you 
from the bottom of my heart. > 

Camp, Indeed ! " Had you but been kind enough 
" to have fent tQ/tne, how .happy fli9|lld I have been 
" in attending your commands ! ; 

" Sir Chr, L believe you wouM, egad— ha ! ha? 
" fent to you r Very well ! ha! ha! ha! 4 ^^Y 
" rogue! YauM .l\ave beqn ready enough to come my 
" boy, I dard fay. . (Laughing.) 

Camp, " But now, Sir if, with yeur leave, I may 
ftill venture to -.mention Mifs Narciffa 

Sir Chr. An impatient, fenfible yoiing- dog! like 
me to a hair I Set your heart at i*eft, rhy bOy. She's 
your^s ; your's before to- morrow morning. 

Camp, Amazement ! I can fcarce believe my fenfes* 
3 Sir 

A N 

O ? E R A. 


Sir Chr, Zounds ! you ought to be out of youf 
fenfes ; but difpatch— -make fhort work of it, ever while 
yuu live, my boy. 

Sir Chr, Did you ! Ah, fly dog-*-had a meeting 
before you came to the old Gentleman*— But hcte— 
Take him, and make much of him— and, for fear of fur- 
ther feparations, you ftiall e'en be tack'd together di- 
redWy. What fay you, girl ? 

Camp, Will my NarciflTa confent to my happinefs ? 

Nar, I always obey my father's comn^ands, with 
plcafure. Sir. 

Sir Chr, Od ! I'm fo happy, I hardly know Which 
way to turn j but we'll have the carriage diredtty ; drive 
down to the quay j trundle old Spintext into church; and 
hey for matrimony ! 

Camp, With all my heart, Sir Chriftopher; the 
fooner the better. 

Sir Christopher, Camplev, Narcissa, 

Sir Chr. Tour ColimtteSy end Arriittes^ 


EnUr Narcifla and Patty, 

Here, girl : here's your fwain. [To Nar, 

Camp, " I juft parted with my Narcifla, On the quay, 

Wafle years in lovel 
But modern folks knoiv better jokes^ 

And^ CQurxing once begun^ 
To church they hop at once— and fop^-^^ 
Egady 'aWs dont! 


In life we prance a country dance^ 

Where every couple Jlands % 
Their partners fet^-^a while eurvett^* 

But foQn join hands. 



SO INK L E ,AN[D -Y A S. I C 0% 

Nar. When at our feet^ fo trim and neat^ 
Hhe powdered lover fues^ 
He vows he d'les^ the lady /ighsy 

But can't refufe, 
jlh! how can Jhe^ unmov'dy eer fee] 

Her fwain his death incur? 
Jf once the Squire is feen expire^ 
He lives with her, 

AIL In life, ^c. &c. 

Fatty, When fohn. and Bet^are fairly mty 
John boldly tries his luck-. 
He Jicals a bufs^ without more fufsy 

*The bargain^ s firuck* 
Whilji things below are g^ing fif - 

Is Betty pray to blame ? 
Who knows, up flairs, her mijlrcfs fares 
jujl, jpjl t he fame* 

AJIr In life 'We pr^ncey ifcr i!fc, [Exeunt, 

E^id of the SECOND ACT. 

A N Q P E R A, 



SCENE I. The ^ay. 
EnUr Patty, 

■Me RCY on us! what a walk I hav€ had of It! 
Well, Tnatt'crs goon fwimmingly at the governor's— The 
old gentleman has ordeiM the carriage, and the young 
couple will be whifk*d, here, to the church, in a quarter of 
ah hour. My bufinefs is to prevent young foberfides. 
Young Inkle, from appearing, to interrupt the ceremony. 
— Ha! here's the Crown, where I hear he is hous'd. 
So now to find Trudge, and trump up a ftory, in the true 
ftile of a chambermaid. {Goes into the houje,) (Patty 
sjuithin ) I tell you it don't fignify, and I will come up. 
{Trudge within,) But it does fignify, and you can't 
ComQ up. 

Re-enter Patty, with Trudge. 

Patty, You had better fay at once, I fhan't. 

Trudge, Well then you fhan't. 

Patty, Savage ! Pretty behaviour you have pick'd up 
amongit the Hottypots ! Y our London civility, like Lon- 
don itfelf, will foonbe loft in fraoke, Mr. Trudge; and 
the politcnefs you have lludied fo long in Threadneedle- 
ftreet, blotted out by the blacks you have been living 

Trudge, No fuch thing; Ipra£lis'd my poiitenefs all 
the while I was in the woods. Our very lodging taught 
me good manners; for I could never bring myfelf togo 
into it without bowing. 

G % Patty. 

52 I NX LiESA^D Am lAC O: 

Patty, Don't tell Imer! "lA: OTghiCy, mvil.^^^ 
you give a body, Xrhlj-^ after a fix weeks- parting \ 

Trudge-. Gad, you're right ; I am a: little out here, to 
be fure. f^z^^i i?^r./ W 

~ Pattf, Pihaw, Eellow want none'of ^oyr kifTes. 

Trudge, Oh! very well— I'll take it again. (Offers: 
to kifs her,) ~ - \ , . 

Patty, Be quiet. I want to fee Mr. Inkfe ^rl hate 
a meflage to him from Mifs NarciiS* : i iliall get a fight 
of him, nov/, I believe. : . :lvk : ' ^ ? 

Trudge. May be not. He*s;a little hufy at prefentf 

P/7^/y. Bu(y— ha ! Plodding! What iife's at ; 
multiplication again? - . / ^ ' 

Trudge, Very Mkely: : fb it would be a pii^)tO'.Ster* 
rupthim, you know. 4\oc 

Patty, Certainly ; and the whole <^^my bufinefl was 
to prevent his hurrying himielf---Tellhim, we fhan't be 
ready to receive him at the Governoi:'& tiH tOAfnorrow, 
d'ye hear? 7 ^-.^v: :T 

Trudge, No? " V.Vi'^ 

Paiiy* No I Things are not prepared. The place 
isn't in order ; and the iervants have not had proper no- 
tice of the arrival. 

Trudge, Oh ! let me alone to give the fervants notice 
- -Rat— Tat»-Tat— It's all the notice we had in ThreasI-. 
jieedle-ftreet of the arrival of a vifitor. 

Patty, Tlueadneedle-ftreet I Threadneedle nonfenfe ! 
I'd haye you to know we do every thing, here, with an 
air. Matters have taken another turn — Stile 1 Stile, 
Sir, is required here, I promife you. 

Trudge, Turn— Stile ! And pray what ftile will ferye 
your turn now, Madam Patty? 

Patty, A due dignity and decorum, to be fure. Sir 
Chriftopher intends Mr. Inkle, you know, for his fon-in-. 
kw, and muft receive him in public form, (which can't 
be till to-morrow morning) for the honor of his gover- 
norfhip : why the whole ifland will ring of it. 

Trudge, The devil it will ! 

Patty. Yes ; they've talk'd of nothing but my mif- 
trefs's beauty and fortune, for thefe fix weeks. Then 
he'il be introduced to the bride, you know. 

^ Trudge^ 

o a: n 6 p £ m a 


m Trudge* O, my poor mafter! 

Patty, Then a publick breakfaft ; then a proceffton ; 
dien— if nothing happens to prevent it, he*ll get into 
church and be married in a crack. 

Trudge, Then he'll get into a damn'd fcrape, in a 

Patty, Hey-day I a fcrape I The holy fEate of ma- 
> trimony I 

in Trudge^ Yes; it's plaguy holy; and mapy of its vo-^ 
taries, as in other jioly ftates, live in repentance and mor- 
tificatioiu . Ah! poor Madam Yarico! My poor piU 
^riick^of-a mailer, what will become of him ? ( Half ajide,^) 
Patty, Why, what's the matter with the booby? . 
-V':Tr«i^f, Nothing, nothing—- he'll be hang'd for 
P^ft^. Pdly who? 
5G Trudge, It niuft ouN— Patty! 
^<4z Batty. Well? : -v 

Ttiidge, Can you keep a fecret ? - 
Patty, Try me! 

drudge, .Then \JVhlfpering'] My mafter keeps i girl. 
Patty, Ohmonftrous! another woman? :\^.ci. 
Trudge, As fure as one and one make twoi so -^ob 
Patty, [Aftde,] Rare news for my miftrefsl-xXWhy 
\ can hardly believe it: the grave, fly, fteady, foberlMr. 
Inkle, do fuch a thing! :r?i;;-3;b..oa 
Trudge, Pooh! it's always your fly, (bbfi^^lSlows, 
/-^t go the moft after the girls. • . v/;d £>'l 

J ■ patty. Well; I ihould fooner fufped- j'ijzr. - ; .t"s 

Trudge, Me? Oh Lord! he! he! — Do vdii.tKmk: 
- any fmart, tight, little black eyed wench, v/ou^a Wflruck 

with my figure? [Conceited/y,'} ■ ■ ; •» -v 

■v': Patty, -Pfhaw! never mind your figure; 'K^T^II me 
-feow it hapf)en'd? r; . * 

Trudge: ' You (hall hear : when the {hip left us aflidre, 
my naaittr^turn'd as paie as a iheet of paper,' It ish't 
every body:that's bleit with courage, Patty. ■ 
Patty, True! 

Trudge.' Ploivever, I bid him cheer up; told him, 
to ftick to my elbow: took the lead, and began- our 
march, ' i 


54 INKLE AND V A R 1 C O: 

' Patty ^ Well? 

drudge. We hadn't gone far, when a damn'd onCs, 
eyed black; boar, that grhm'd lifce a devil^ came down 
the hill in jog trot! My madgr melted as taft as a 
pot of pomatum ! 

Patty, Mercy on us! 

Trudge. But what does I do, but whipa out my defk 
Jcnife, that I us'd to cut the quills with at home; met 
the monller, and flit up his throat li Icq a pen— —The 
boar bled like a pig. 

Patty, Lord ! Trudge, what a great traveller you 

Trudge. Yes j I remember we fed on the ilitch for 
2l week. 

Patty, Well, well; but the Lady. 

'Trudge. The Lady? (), true. By and by we 
came to a cave — a large hollow room, under ground, 
like a warehoufe in the Adelphi — Well; there we were 
half an hour, before I could get him to go in; there's 
no accounting for fear you know. At laft, in we went, 
to a place hung round with fkins, as it might be a 
Furrier's (hop, and there was a fine Lady, fnoring on a, 
bow and arrows. 

Patty. What, all alone? 

Trudge. Eh ! — -No— no— no. Hum— She had ^ 

young lion by v/ay of a lap-dog. 

Patty, Gemini ! what did you do? 

Trudge. Gave her a jog, and fhe open'd her eyes--* 
fne ftruck my mafter immediately. 

Patty. Mercy on us! with what? 

Iruclge. With her beauty, you Ninny, to be fure : 
and they foon brought matters to bear. The wolves 
witneGM the contract — I gave her away— The crows 
cronk'd Amen; and we had board and lodging for 

Patty. And this is fhe he has brought to Barbadoesr 
Trudge. T he fame. 

Patty. Well; and tell me Trudge ;— file's pretty, 
you fay— Is (lie fair or brown? or — - — 

Trudge, Um! fhe's a good comely copper. 
Patty. How ! a Tawney r 


^A.. N OPERA. , 55 

Trudge* Yes ; quite dark j but very [elegant ; like a 
Wedge- wood tea-pot. 

Patty, Oh! the monfter! the filthy fellow! Live 
with a black-a-moor I 

T rudgc. Why there's no great harm in*t, I hope. 

Patty, Faugh ! I wou'dn't let him kifs me for the 
world : heM malce my face all fmutty. 

Trudge, .Zounds! you are mighty nice all of a fud- 
clenj but I'd have you to know, Madam Patty, that 
Blackamoor Ladies, as you call 'em, are fome of the 
very few, whofe complexions never rub oft! S'bud, if 
they did. Wows and I Ihou'd have changed faces by this 
time— But mum ; not a word for your life. 

Patty, Not I ! except to the Governor and family. 
[JJide.] But I muft run- -and, remember. Trudge, it 
your mafter has made a miftake here, he has himfeit to 
thank for his pains. 


Tho* lovers^ like markfmen^ all aim at the hearty 

Some hit ivide of the mark, as W: wenches all know \ 

But of all the bad JhotSy he's the worjl in the art 

Whojhoots at a pigeon^ and kills a crow ho ! 

Tourmafler haskiWda crrii , 


When younkers go out^ the firji time in their liveSy 
At random they (hoot^ and let fly as they go ; 

So your majler^ unJkiWd how to level at wives^ 
Has Jhot at a pigeon^ and kiWd a crow. 



Love and money t'ous wo/fed^ in terrible trim! 

His powder is fpent^ and his Jhot running low : 
Tet the pigeon he mijs*dy I've a notion^ with him 
JVill nevery for fuch a mi/lake^ pluck a crow^ 
No! no! 

Tour majl^ jnay keep his crew, 
3 [ Exit Patty. 


5^ INKLE ANi> V A R 1 C O: 

Trudge, Pfhaw ! thefe girls are fo plaguy proud of 
their white and red ! but I won't be fliamed out of 
Wows, that's flat. Mafter, to be fure, while we were 
in the foreft, taught Yarico to read, with his pencil and 
pocket-book. What then ? Wows comes on fine and 
fafi in her leflbns. A little awkward at firft, to be fure. 
— Ha ! ha !— -She's fo us'd to feed with her hands, that 
I can't get her to eat her vi<StuaIs, in a genteel, Chriftian 
way, for the foul of me ; when fhe has ftuck a morfel on 
her fork, (he don't know how to guide it; but pops up 
her knuckles to her mouth, and the meat goes up to her 
car. But, no matter— After all the fine, flafhy, London 
girls, Wowlki's the wench for my money. 


A Clerk I was m London gayy 

yemmy I'mkum feedle^ 
And went in hoots to fee the play^ 

Merry fiddlem tweedle, 
I marched the lobby^ twWV dmy Jlkk^ 

Diddle^ daddky deedle\ 
J he girls all crfd^ " He's quite the kick!*' 

Oh^ Jemmy linkum feedle» 


Hey I for A?mrica I fail^ 

Yankee doodle deedle ; 
The failor boys cry^d^ fmoke hh tail !** 

yemmy linkum feedle. 
On Engliftj belles 1 turned 'my hack^ 

Diddle^ daddle^ deedle -y i 
And got a foreign Fair^ quite Btticky 

twaddle^ twaddle^ tweedle ! 

Ill, Tour 

!• III. 

Tlrur Lomhn girls^ uulth roguijh trlp^ 
■^U:. Ji^hiedle^ wheedle^ whtedle^ 
May boai^ their pouting under^Up^ 

Fiddle, f a J^le^feedle. 
Afy Wows 1XJ0U d beat a hundted fuch^ 

Diddle^ -daddhy deedle, 
iVhofe uppn-'lip pouts twice as much^ 

O, prrtty (huhk wheedli / 

Rings I' ll buy to deck her tees ; 

yernmy linkum feedle 5 
A feather fine fnall grace her nofe : 

IVa'uing ftdle jeedle. 
With jeahujy I ne'er Jhall hurjl ; 

fJ'^D'd fteal my bone of hone-a f 
A white Othello, J can trii/i 

A dingy Defdemona^ 

S C E N E II. A Room in the Crown* 
Enter Inkle. 

I know not .what to think— -I have given her dillant 
hints of parting ; but ftill, fo fl rong her confidence in my 
afFe6lion, fhe prattles on without regarding me. Poor 
Yarico ! I muft not— cannot quit her. When I wou*d 
fpeak, her look, her mere fimplicity difarms me: I dare 
not wound fuch innocence. Simplicity is like a fmiHng 
babe ; which, to the ruffian, that wouM murder it, 
ftretching its little, naked, helplefs arms, pleads, fpeech- 
lefs, itsowacaufe. And yet Narciila's family— — 




58 INKLE AND y A R I C O : 

Enter Trudge. 

Trudge. There he is, like a beau befpeaking a coaN— » 
doubtin<j which colrtur to chuie-— Sir— 
Inkle, What nowi 

Trudge, Nothing unexpecled. Sir: — I hope you 
^von't be angry. 
hikle. Angry \ 

Trudge, i'm forry for it ; but I am comt to give you. 
joy, Sir! 

Inkle. Joy ! of what ! 

Trudge. A wife, Sir; a white one I know it will 

vex you, but Mifs NarcilTa means to make you happy 
to-morrow morning. 

Inkle. To-morrow ' 

Trudge. Yes, fir ; and as I have been out of em- 
ploy, in both my capacities. lately, after I have drefsM 
your hair, I may draw up the marriage articles. 

ffikle. Whence comes your intelligence, fir ? 

Trudge. Patty told me all that has pafs'd in the Go- 
vernor's famih^, on the quay, iir. Women, you know, 
can never keep a fecret. You'll be introduced in form, 
with the whole ifiand to witnefs it. 

/n-i/". So public too ! —Unlucky! 

Trudge.* There will be nothing but rejoicings In 
compliment to the wedding, fhe tells me ; all noHe and 
uproar ! Married people liKie it, they fay. 

Ifikle. Strange ! That I fhould be fo blind to my 
inte-reft, as to be the only perfon this diftrcfles ! 

Trudge. They are talking of nothing elle but the 
niateh, it feems. , . 

Inkk. Conf iifion ! How can I, in honor, retra£t ? " 

Trudze. And the bride's merits 

Inkie. True ! — A fund of merits wou'd not — 
bat from nccellity — a cafe fo nice as this--~-I — wou'd 
Hot v/ifii to retraft. 

Trudge, Then they call her fo handfome, 

Jnkle, Very true * fo handfonie ! the v'hole world 
-vrou'd hugh me : they'd <. S k koWy to retracr. 




Trudge, And then they fay fo much of her fortune. 

Inkle, O death ! it would be Tnadnefs to rctraiR:. 
Surely, my faculties have flept, and this, long parting 
from my Narcilla, has blunted my fenfe of her accom- 
plifhments. 'T'is this alone makes me fo weak and 
wavering. I'll fee her immediately. [^'^'^^'^^^.J 

- l^rudge. Stay, ftay, Sir; I am delir'd to tell you, 
the Governor won't open his gates to us till to-mor- 
row morning, and is now making preparations to receive 
you at breakfaft, with all the honours of matrimony. 
, Inkle, Well, be it fo ; it will give me time, at all 
events, to put my affairs in train. 

Trudge, Yes; it's a fhort refpite before execution; 
and if your honour v/as to go and comfort poor Madam 

Inkle, Damnation! Scoundrel, how dare you ofFer 
your advice? — I dread to think of her. 

Trudge. I've done. Sir, Pve done— But I know I 
fhould blubber over Wows all night, if I thought of 
parting with her in the morning. 

Inkle, Infolence ! begone. Sir ! 

Trudge, Lord, Sir, I only ^ 

Inkle, Get down ftairs. Sir, dire6lly. 

Trudge, [Going out,] Ah! you may well put your 
hand to your head ; and a bad head it muft be, to for- 
get that Madam Yarico prevented her countrymen from 
peeling off the upper part of it. {JJide.) [Exit, 

Inkle, 'Sdeath, what am I about? How have I flum* 
bered? " Roufe, roufe, good Thomas Inkle!" Is it I — 
I — who, in London, laugh'd at the younkers of the town 
— -and when I faw their chariots, with fome fine, tempt- 
ing girl, perk'd in the corner, come (hopping to the city, 
wou'd cry— Ah !— there fits ruin— there flies the Green- 
horn's money ! then wopder'd with myfelf how men cou'd 
trifle time on women; or, ind^d, think of any women 
without fortunes. And now, forfooth, it refts with ms 
to turn romantic puppy, and give up AH for Love. — 
Give up !-— Oh monltrous folly- —thirty thoufand pounds I 


6o INK L Zand T A R I C O: 

Trudge, {Peeping m at the dasr,) - ^ 

Trudge. May I come in, Sir? 
Iri^ff^ What does the booby want? 
Tritage. Sir, your uncle wants to fee you, 
Jnkle, Mr. Medium I Shew him up dire^lly. 

[Exit Trudge, 

He mud not know of this. To-morrow!—^ — "I muft 
be blunt with Yarico/* I wiih this marriage were 
more diilant, that I might break it by degrees: She'd 
take 'my purpofe better, were it lefs fuddenly delivered. 

Womens weak minds bear grief as colts do burdens: 
** Load them v/ith their full weight at once, and they 
^' fmk under it; but, every day, add little imperceptibly, 
*^ to little, 'tis wonderful how much they'll carry/' 

Enter Aledium. 

Msd, Ah I here he is ! Give me your hand. Nephew \ 
welcome, welcome to Barbadoes, with all my heart. 

Jnkle. I am glad to meet you here, Unkle f 

Med, That you are, that you are, I'm fure; Lord! 
Lord ! when we parted laft, how I wifh'd we were iri 
a room together, if it was but the black hole 1 ^' Since 
we funder'd," I have not been able to fleep o'nights, for 
thinkii^g of you. I've laid awake, and fancied I faw yout 
ileeping your hfl:, with your head in a lion's mouth, for 
a night cap; and I've never feen a bear brought over, 
to dance about the ftrcet, but I thought you might be 
bobbing up and down in its belly. 

Jnkle. I am very much oblig'd to you, 

Med. Ajj ay, I am happy enough to find you fafc 
and found, I promife you. " Why, I've been hunting 
"you all over the quay, and been in half the houfes upon 

it, before I cou'd find you ; I fl^ould have been here foon-? 

er elfe. Whew !---I'm fo warm — I've run as fafl: 

Inkle. As you did in the foreft— Eh ! Mr. Me- 

" Med. Well, well; thank heaven we are both 
Qut of the foreft! Hounflow-heiih at duii^ is a trifle 


" to It. 1 fhall never fee a tree without ftiaking ; and, 

1 cou*d not walk in a grore again with comfort ; tho' 
" it were in tHr! middle of Paradife.** But, you have a 
fine profpe£l before you row, young map. I am come 
to take you with me to Sir ChrifLopher, who is impa- 
tient to fee vou. 

Jnkle. To-morrow, I hear, he cxpe6ls me. 

Med, To-morrow ! diredlly--— this moment in 

half a fecond.— I left him {landing on tip-toe, as he 
calls it, to embrace you ; and he's ftanding on tip-toe 
now in the great parlour, and there he'll ftand till you 
come to him. 

Inkle. Is he fo hafty ? 

Med. Hafty! he's all pepper— -and wonders yo'i are 
not with him, before it's poffible to get at him. Haftv 
indeed ! Why he vows you fliall have his daughter this 
very night. 

Inkle, What a fituation ! 

Med, Why, it's hardly fair jufl: after a voyage. 
But come, buftle, buftle, he'll think you negled him*. 
He's rare and touchy, I can tell you ; and if he once 
takes it into his head that you (hew the leaft flight to 
his daughter, it wou'd knock up all, your fchemes in a 

Inkle, Confufion ! If he (hould hear of Yarico ! ( Afide, ) 

Med, But at prefent you are all and all with him; he 
has been telling me his intentions thefe fix weeks i you'll 
be a fine warm hufband. I promife you. 

Inkle, This curfcd connection ! [Afide.) 

Med. It is not for me though to tell you how to play 
your cards ; you are a prudent young man, and can 
make calculations in a wood. I need not tell you 

that the leaft fhadow of affront difobliges a tefty old 
" fellow : but, remember, I never fpeak ill of my friends.*" 

Inkle. Fool! fool! fool! (Afide.) 

Med. Why, what the devil is the matter with you ? 

Inkle, Itmuft be done effcv^ually, or all is loft; mere 
parting would not conceal it. (Afide.) 

Med. Ah ! now he's got to his damn'd Square Root 
again, I fuppofe, and Old Nick would n jt m^ve hiai— - 
Why, ne^; hew I 



Inkle. The planter that I fpoke with cannot be ar- 
rlv'd—- but time is precious-— the firft I meet— com- 
mon prydence now demands it. Fm fix'd j Til part 
with her. {Afide,) [Exit, 

Med. Damn me, but he*s mad ! The woods have 
turn'd the poor boy's brains ; he's fcaip'd, and gone 
crazy! Holo! Inkle! Nephew! Gad, I'll fpoil your 
arithmetick, I warrant me. .\_ExiU 

SCENE, Ihe ^ay. 
Enter Sir Q\\n{!to^\\tx (Zxixxy 

Sir Chr, Ods my life ! I can fcarce contain my hap^ 
pinefs. I have left e'm fafe in church in the middle of the 
ceremony. I ought to have given Narcifla away, they 
told me; but I caper'd about Jo much for joy, that Old 
JSpintext advifed me to go and cool my heels on the quay, 
till it was all over. Odd, I'm fo happy ! and they (hall 
fee, now, what an old fellow can do at a wedding-* 

Enter Inkle, 

Inkle. Now for dlfpatch ! Hark'ee, old gentleman ! 
(to the gover?ior). 

Sir Chr. Well, young gentleman ? 

Ifikte. If I miftake not, I know your bufinefs here. 

Sir Chr, 'Egad, I believe half the ifland knows it, by 
this time. 

Inkle. Then to the point---! have a female, whom I 
wiHi to part with. 

Sir Chr. Very likely; it's a common cafe, nowa- 
days, v/ith many a man. 

Inkle. If you could fatisfy me you would ufe her 
mildly, and treat her with more kindnefs than is ufual — 
(or I can tell you fhe's of r.o common ftamp~--perhaps 
we might agree. 

Sir Chr. O\\o\ a Have! Faith, now I think on't, my 
daughter may want an attendant or two extraordinary:; 




and as you fay {he*s a delicate girl, above the common 
rurj, and none of your thick-lip'd, flat-nos'd, fquabby, 
dumpling dowdies, I don*t>much care if- — 

InkU, And for her treatment— - 

Sir Chr, Look ye, young man ; I love to be plain: I 
fhall treat her a good deal better than you wou'd, 1 fancy ; 
for, though i witnefs this cullom every day, I can't help 
thinking the only excufe for buying our fellow creatures, 
is to relcue 'em from the hands of thofe who are unfeeling 
enough to bring them to market. 

Inkle, " Somewhat too blunt, Sir; 1 am no commou 
trafficker, dependent upon prgud rich planters." Fair 
v/ords, old gentleman j an Engliiliraan won't put up an 

Sir Cbr. An Englifhman 1 More fhame for you ! 
" Let Englifhmen blufh at fuch pracSlices." Men, who 
fo fully feel the bleilings of liberty, are doubly cruel iu 
depriving the helplefs of their freedom, 

« JnHe. Contufion! 

" Sir Chr. 'Tis not my place to fay fo much ; but 1 
can't help fpeaking my mind. 

^ Jnklf, " I muS be cool"— Let me afTure you^ Sir^ 
'tis not my occupation ; but for a private reafon— an in- 
ftant preffing necefTity— • 

Sir Chr, Well, well, I have a»prelling neceiHty, toe; 
1 can't fliand to talk now; I expe6l company here pre-, 
fently ; butjf you'll afk forme to-morrow, at the Caftle-- 

MIe. TheCaftle! 

Sir Cbr, Aye, Sir, the Caflle; the Governor's Caftle ; 
known all over Barbadoes. 

Inkle, 'Sdeath, this man mufl be on the Governor's 
cftablifhment : his fteward, perhaps, and fent after m?, 
while Sir Chriftopher is impatiently waiting for me. 
I've gone too far; my fecret may be known — Af 'tis, 
I'll win this fellow to my interefh [to him) One word 
more, Sir: my bufinefs muit be done immediately; and 
as you feern acquainted at the Caftle, if you fhould fee n.e 
there-— and there I mean to flcep to-nif^ht--^ 

Sir Cbr, The Devil you do ! 

H I N K L £ AKO y A ]fc I C O: 

IrJIe. Your finger On your Hps ; and never breath at 

fyll- e of this tranfacHon. 
Si'r Chr, N6 » Why not ? 

Inkle* Becaufe, for reafons, which perhaps you'll know 
to-morrow, I might be injured with the Governor, whofe 
mod particular friend ! am. 

Sir Chr. So here's a particular friend of mine, com- 
ing to fleep at my houfe, that I never faw in my life. I'll 
found this fellow. {Jfide.) I fancy, young gentleman, as 
you are fuch a bofom friend of the Governor's, you can 
hardly do any thing to alter your fituation with him ? I 

fhou'dn't imagine any thing could bring him to think 
** a bit worfe of you than he does at prefent." 

Inkh. Oh ! pardori me ; but you'll find that here- 
after— befides you, doubtlefs know his character? 

Sir Chr, Oh, as well as I do my own. But let's 
nnderftand one another. You ma y Li me, now you've 
gone \o far. You are acquainted with his characSler, no 
doubt to a hair ? 

Inklr, I am-— I fee we fhall underfl-and each other* 
You know him too, I fee, as well as I.— A very touchy, 
tefty, hot old fellow. 

Sir Chr. Here's a fcoundrel ! I hot and touchy 1 
Zounds ! I can hardly contain liiy paflion !-— But I 
won't difcover myfelf. I'll fee the bottom of this— 
(to him ). Well now, as we feem to have come to a to- 
lerable explanation— Let's proceed to bufinefs — Bring 
me the woman. 

hkle. No ; there you mud excufe me. I rather 
wou'd avoid feeing her any more ; and wifii it to be fettled 
withc^ut my feeming interference. My prefence might 
didrefs her.-— You conceive me ? 

Sir Chr. Zoun^ls! what an unfeeling rafcal 1 — Tht 
poor girl's in love with him, I fappofe. No, no, fair and 
open. My dealing's with you, and you only ; I fee her 
now, or I declare oft. 

Jnkie. Well then, you muft be fatisfied : yonder's mjr 
fervant— ha— a thought has flruck me.— -Come htre, 

3 f:tiur 

A N O P E R A, 65 

Enter Trudge. 

ril write my purpofe, and fend it her by him. — It's 
lucky that I taught her to decypher chara6ters ; my la- 
^bour now. is paid. [Takes out his pockct-bedk and writes.) 
—This is fomewhat lefs abrupt; ^twill Ibften matters [ts 
hhnfelf). Give this to Yarico; then bring her hither. 
,with you. 

Trudge, Ifliall, Sir. (Going.) 

Inkle. Stay ; come back. This foff fool, if unin- 
flrucled, may add to her dittrefs: his drivelling fympa- 
^thy may feed her . grief, inftead of foothing it, — When 
fhe has read this paper> feem to make light of it; tell 
her it is a thing, of cqurfe, done purely for her good. I 
here inform her that I muA part with her. D'ye under- 
ftahd yoUrleflbh ? ' 

Trudge. Pa— -part with Ma— -madam Y^-ric-o ! 

Jnkle. Why does the blockhead ftammer! — I have 
my reafons. No muttering---An.d let me tell you. Sir, 
if your rare bargain were gone too, /twou'd be the b^t- 
^er : (he may babbk-^jr flory of the forefl:, and fpoil my 

Triidg£, I'm forry for it, Sir ; I have lived with you a 
k>ng while; I've half a year's wages too due the 25th ulto, 
due for dreffing your hair, and fcribbling your parch- 
ments ; but take my fcribbling ; take my frizzing ; 
take my wages ; and I, and Wows, will take ourfelves 
gfF togethe.f-— fhe fav'd my life^ and rot me, §ir, if any 
thing but death fhall part us. 

Inkle. Impertinent ! Go, and deliver your meflage. 
• Trudge. _ I'm gone. Sir. Lord, .Lord I I never carr 
i\t^ a letter with luch ill will in all my born days. [^Exlt. 
C/;r. Well— (halll fee the girl? 

inkle. She'll be here pr-efently. One thing I had 
jforgot: when fhe is your's, 1 need not caution you^ 
after the hints I've given, to keep her from the caftle. 
Jf". Sir Chriftopher fhould fee her, 'twould lead, you 
iKnow, to a difcovery of what I wiih conceal'd. 

6'/V C'^r." Depend upon /w^— Sir Chriltoj^her wjll 
I kiiovy 

66 r N K L E A N D Y A R I G O: 

know no more of our meeting, than he does at this 
moment. ' ' i ,' 

Inkle. Your fecrecy fhall '-jiqt "be unrewarded t^^ I^f^^ 
recommend you, particularly, to his good graces. f 

Sir Chr, Thank: ye, thank ye ; but I'm pretty riiucSf^'' 
in his good graces, as it is ; I don't know any body hQ 
has a greater refpecl for. 

Re-enter Trudge, 

/nkic. Now, Sir, have you perform "d your meflage ? . . 

Trutlge, Yes, I gave her the letter, 

Inkle. And where is Yarico ? did {he fay fhe'd come ? 
didn't you do as you were orderM? didn't you (^ak^lq 
her? • - |. ,1 ,-^ 

Trudge, I cou'dn't. Sir, I couMn't---! intended 
to fay what you bid me— -but I felt fuch a pain in my 
throat, I cou'dn't fpeak a word^ for the foul of me j and 
fo, Sir, I fell a crying. 
" , . Blockhead ! 

Sir Chr. . 'Sblood, but he's a very honed blockhead. 
Tell me, my good fellow — what faid the wench ? 

drudge. Nothing at all. Sir. She fat down with her 
two hands clafp'd on her knees, and lopk'd fo pitifully ia 
my face, I cou'd not ftand it. Oh, here Ihe comes, 
rihgo and find Wows. If I muft be melancholy, file 
ihall keep me company. 

Sir Chr 4. Qds my Ufe^ as comely a wench^ as ever I 

Enter Yarico, who looks fome time in Inkle's facCy biirjil 
into tears y and falls on his neck, , ' ' 

Inlile. In tears ! nay, Yarico \ why this 1 

Tar, Oh do not— -do not leave me! 
. Inkle. . Why, fun pie girl ! I'm labouring for-your good. 
My interefl:, here, is^ nothing; I can do nothing froni' 
^yfelfj you are ignorant of our country's cuHoms. Vl 



fniift give way to men more powerful, who will hot " 
have me with you. But fee, my YaricO, ever ahxiau^?" 
for your welfare, Vvc found a kind good perfon, who 
will proteciil you, " 

Tarico, Ah \ why not you protetSl rhe f ' 

Jnkle. I have no means - -how can I ? 

I'arico. Jult as I fhelter'd you. Take me to yori- 
der mountain, where I fee no fmoke from tall, high 
houfes, fiird with your cruel countrymen* None of 
your princes, there^ will come to take me froni you. 
And, fl:ioU}d they ftray that xvay; we'll find a lurking 
place, juft like my own poor cave; where many a day. 
I fat belide you, and blefs'd the chance that brought you 
to it— that I might fave your life. 

Sir Chi\ His. lite! Zounds! tiiy blood boils at the 
fcoundrei's ingratitude ! 

lar; Come, come, let's go* I always fear*d thefe 
cities. Let's fly and feek the woods j arid there we'll 
wander hand m hand together. No cares fhail vex us 
then — We'll let the day glide by in idlenefs ; and you 
fhall fit in the fhade, and watch the fun-beam playing on 
the brcokj v/hile I will fuig the fong that pleafes'you. 
No cares, love, but for food— -and we'll live cheerily I 
warrant— -In the frcfli, early morning, you fhall hwit 
down our game.; and 1 v/ill pick yon berries— and then; ' 
at night, Til trim our bed of leaves, and lie me dawn in 
psace^— Oh ! v/e (hail be fo h2pj)y . - 

■ Inhlc, This i5 mere trliling— the triTiing of ait un - 

enlightenM Indian." Hear me/ Yarico: My coun- 
trymen and yoUr's difFer as much in minds as :li com-- 
plexions. We were not borfi to live in woods and 
cav?s-— -to feek fubfiftence by purfuing beafis-- — ^Vve 
chriilians, girl, huntrnoneyj a thing unknown to yOMf- - 
But, here, 'tis money which brings us eafe, plenty, 
command, power,- every thing,- and of coune hi^ppineis^ 
You are tlie {jiar to my attaining this therefore 'tis 

neceilary for my good -«and which X tliink jgu 

value — — ■ ■ 

, laricQ, You know I do; fa much, that it Wou'd* 
t>rc«ik tin V Heart to leave you. 


Inkle, But we muft part. If you are feen with me^ 
1 fhall lofe all. 

Tar. I gave up all for you— my friends — my coun- ; 
try : all that was dear to me : and ftlll grown dearer , 
fmce you fbielter'd there-- -All) all was left for you— and 
were it now to do again— -again I'd crofs the feas, and 
follow you all the world over. 

Inkle. We idle time ; Sir, flie is your's. See you 
obey this gentleman j 'twill be the better for you. 

Tar. O barbarous ! [holding him) Do not, do not 
abandon me ! 

Inkle, No more. 

Tar, Stay but a little. I flian't live long to be a 
burden to you. Your cruelty has cut me to the heart. 
Prote£l me but a liule— or I'll obey this man, and un- 
dergo all hardfhips for your good; ftay but to witnefs 
'em. I foon fliali fink with grief; tarry till then ; and 
hear me blefs your name when I am dying ; and beg you, 
now and then, when I am gone, to heave a figh for your 
poor Yarico. 

Inkle, I dare not liflen. You, Sir, I hope, will take 
good care of her. (going.) 

Sir Chr. Care of her!— that I will— I'll cherifh 
her like my own daughter; and pour balm into the heart 
of a poor, innocent girl, that has been wounded by the 
artifices of a fcoundrel. 

liJde. Hah! 'Sdeath, Sir, how dare you 

Sir Chr,' 'Sdeath, Sir, how dare you look an honefl 
man in the face ? 
' Inkle, Sir, you fliall feeb-- 

Sir Chr, Feel ! — It's more than ever you did, I be- 
lie^. Mean, fordid, wretch ! dead to all ienle of honour, 
gratitude, or hunianity-— I never heard offuch barbarity ! 
I have a ioi)-in-law, who has been left in the fiime fitu-- 
atio:i; but, if I thought him capable of fuch cruelty, 
dam'aie if I vv'^ou'd not turn him to fea, with a peck loaf, 
iii ,i cockle rnelU-'Come, come, cheer up, my girl ! 



You flian't want a friend to prote<Sl you, I warrant 
you. — (takingYsLUCO by the hand.) 

inkle, Infoleiice 1 The Governor fhall hear of tins 

Sir Chr. The Governor! lyar I cheat! rogue: 
impollor! breaking all tics you ought to keep, and pre- 
tending to thofe you have no right to. The Governor 
had never fuch a fellow in the whole catalogue of his . 
acquaintance— the Governor difowns you— the Cjo- 
vernor difciaims you---the Governor abhors you ; and 
your utter confuuon, here (lands the Governor to tell you 
io. Here ftands old Curry, who' never talk'd to a rogue 
■without telling him what he thought of him. 

Inkle, Sir Chnftopher 1— -Loit and undone'! 

Mtd. (Without.) Holo! Young rvlultiplication 1 
Zounds 1 1 have been peeping in every cranny of the 
houfe. Why young Rule of Three ! {Enters from the 
hin) Oh, here you are at laft,— Ah, Sir Chriitopher ! 
What are you there ! too impatient,'! fee, to v/a;t at home. " 
But here's one that will make you cafy, I fancy. [Chip- 
pjn,^ Inkle on the fhoiddcr. ) 

Sir Chr. How -came you to know him ? 

A^ed. Ha ! ha ! Well that's curious enough too. So 
you have been talking, here, without finding out each 
uther ? 

Sir Chr. No, no ; I have found him out, with a 

Afed. Not you. Why tliis is the dear boy. It's 
my nephew, thati^ ; your fon-in-law, that is tJ be. It's 

Sir Chr. It's a lie ; and you're a pufbl-ind, old booby— 
and this dear boy is a damn'd fcouudrel. 

Aled. Hey-dcy, what's the meaning of this ? ^ue 
was mad before, and he has bit the other, I fuppofe. 

Sir Chr. But- here comes the dear boy — the true 
boy— the jolly boy, pining hot from church, with my 

7a I N K L E and t A R I C O: 

Barter Gampley, NarciiTaj and Patty. 

Gampley! , • 
SirChr, Who ? Gampley ?~— It's no fuch thing, '• 'ii 
, Caiiipw That's my name, nideed, Sir Chriftopher. 
Sir Chr, The Devil it is ! And how cattle you, Sir.j 
to impofe upon me, and aflixmc the name of Inkle ? A 
name which every man of honefty ought to be afhamed 

Camp, I never did^ Sir. — Since I failed frorti England^ 
with your daughter, my affe6tion has daily encreafed.;,;., 
and. when I came to explain myfelf to you^ by a number 
of concurring circumliances, which 1 am itow partly// 
acquainted with, you miftook me for that gentleman. Yet 
bad I even then been aware of your miflake, I muft con- 
fefs, the regard for my own happinefs would have ternpted. 
me to let you remain undeceiv'd. : . 

Sir Chr^ And did you, NarcifTa, join in-— 

NaT, Hov.'" could I, my dear Sir, difobey vou ? 

Fatty. Lord, your honour, what young Lady coulcf 
refufa a Captain ? . • ' ^ 

'C>s?np, 1 am a Soldier, Sir Chrlfl:opher. Love and. ' 
War, is the foldier's motto; and tho' my income is tri- 
flini^ to your intended fon-in-hw's, ftill the chance of war 
h:iis enabled me to fupport the obje61: of my love above- ^ 
inJicrence. Her fortune, Sir Chriltopher^ i do not con^ 
fidcr myfelf by any means entitled to. 

Sir Chr. 'Sblcod i but you muif tho\ Glt^e me your} 
hand, my young Mais,, and blefs you both together |. 
-—Thank youj thank you for cheating an old fool into 
giving his daughter to a lad of fpirit, when he was going 
to r!#ovv her av/ay upon one in whofc breait the mean 
pafiion of avariLC Imothers the fmaliefl: fpark of afFcdtion^..- ' 
or humanity. ' ■ ., „ 

J/;i.','. . Confufion I a" 
Nar. I have this moment heard a ftory of a tranfaC'' " 
tion in the foreft, which, I own, would have rendered a 
compliaacc with your fornier commvinds very difagree-. ; 


A . N . O P R A. 

Patiy, yes, Sir, I told mj miftrcfs he had brought 
over a Hotty-pot gentlewoman. 

Sir Chr» Yes, but he would have left her for you ; 
[To Narcijja) and you for his intereft- and fold you^ 
perhaps, as he has this poor girl to me, as a requital for 
preferving his life. 
' Nar, How 1 

Enter Trudge end Wowfki. 

Trudge, Come along, Wows I take a long lafl leave' 
of your poor Miltrefs : throw your pretty, ebony arms 
about her neck. 

Wcws, No, no ; — (he not go ; you not leave poor 
Wowfki. {Thrtwing her arms about Yaxiqo.) 

Sir Chr. Poor girl ! A companion I take it ! 

Trudge, A thing of my own, Sir. I couMn't help 
following my mafter's example in the woods— Z/>^^ 
MaJIer^ like Man, 

Sir Chr, But you wou'd not fell her, and be hang'd 
to you, you dog, wouM you ? 

Trudge. Hang me, like a dog, if I wou'd. Sir, 

Sir Chr, So fay I to every fellow that breaks an ob- 
ligation due to the feelings of a man. But, old Medium, 
what have you to fay for your hopeful nephew ? 

Med, I never fpeak ill of my friends. Sir Chrillo- 

Sir Chr, Pfiiaw! 

Inkle, Then let me fpeak : hear me defend a con- 
(luft — 

Sir Chr, Defend! Zounds! plead guilty at once— * 
its the only hopes left of obtaining mercy. 

Jnkle, Suppofe, old Gentleman, vou had a fon ? 

Sir Chr, S'blood I then I'd make him an honed fel- 
low; and teach him that the feeling heart never knows 
greater pride than when it's employ'd in giving fuccour 
to the unfortunate. I'd teach him to be his father's owji 
^n to a hair. * 

Inkle, ' Even fo my father tutor'd me: from infancy, 
jbending my tciider mind like a young fapling, to his 


72\ INKLE AND Y A R I C O : 

will-— Intereft was the grand prop round whTch hetwm'd 
niy pliant:, gi ccn, aftcilicns : taught me in childhood to 
repeat old ilivings--aH tending to his own fixM principles— 
aiid the iint fenLence that I ever iifp'dj was Charity begins 

Sir Chr. I ihall never like a nrovcrb aeain as lono- ag* 
I!ive_._ ' - . . °- 

I?:k!e. As I grew up, he'd prove— -and by example 
— v/ere I in \rant, I might e^en ftarve,- for what the 
world cared for their neighbours ; why then foou'd I care 
k*T the w-orld ? ■ Men now liv'd for themfeives. Tbefe 
v/ere. his do£i:rines : then, Sir, v*^hat wou'd you fay, 
fhould I, in fpite of habit, precept, education, fly in my 
father's, face, and fpurn his councils ? 

Sir Chr. Say ! why, that you v/ere a damn*d honeiu, 
tindutiful fellov/. O curfe fuch principles 1 Principles, 
whith' ceftroy all confidence between man and m^an — 
Prmclples, which none but a rogue cou'd inftil, and 

none but a rogue cou'd imbibe. ---Principles 

, hikk,: Which I renounce. 

"Sir Chr. Eh! 

Inhle^ denounce entirely. Ill-founded precept tero 
long has fteel'd my breait — but ftiil 'tis vul-nerable— - 
^his trial was too much--Nature, 'gainft Habit combating 
within me, has penetrated to my heart ; a heart, I own, 
long callous to the feelings of fenfibility ; hut now it 
bleeds- --and bleeds for my poor Yarico. Oh, let me 
clafp her to it, while 'tis glowing, and mingle tears of 
love and" pemtence. "[^Embracing ker.'\ 

Trudge. \Cayeriiig about. W(3ws give me a klfs 5 

[^.V'ows Trudge. 

Tar. And fnall we— fliall we be happy I 

Inkle-. Aye ; ever, ever, Yarico. 
• Yarico. I knew we {hou'd— and yet I fear-d— but 
fhail r ftill watch over you? Oh, Love,, you, furely, 
gave your Yarico fuch pain, only to make her feel this 
iiappinefs the greater. 

IFoz'js. [Going tc y'arico ) Oh Wov/fki fo bappy 1— - 
f np' yet l ithink I not glad n'^-ither. 

^y^dtik El^ Wows 1 How!— why not? 


IVoivs. 'Caufe I cari^t help cry. ■> — 

Sir Cbr. Then, if that's the cafe -curfe me, 

if I think Pm very glad either. What the plague's the 
matter with my eyes? — Young man, your hand — lam. 
now proud and happy to fhake it. 

Med. Well, Sir Chrillopher, what do you fay to my 
hopeful nephew now ? 

Sir Cbr, Say ! Why, confound the fellow, I fay, 
that is ungenerous enough to remember the bad adlion 

of a man, v/ho has virtue left in him to repent it. 

As for you, my good fellow, {to Trudge) I muft, with 
your mafter's permifiion, employ you myfelf. 

Trudge. O rare! blefs your honour ! — Wows! 

you'll be Lady, you jade, to a Governor's Factotum. 

Wovjs. Ifs— I Lady Jacktotum. 

Sir Cbr. And now, my young folks, we'll drive 
home, and celebrate the wedding ! Od's my life ! I 
long to be fhaking a foot at the fiddles : and I fhall dance 
ten times the lighter, for reforming an Inkle, while I 
have it in my power to reward the innocence of a 


C A M P L E y. 

Co?ne let 7is dance and Jtng^ 

labile all Barbadoes hells fiall ring : 

Love fcrapes the fiddle-flring^ 

And F mus play s tbe lute ; 
Hymen gay^ foots away^ 
Happy at our wedding-day^ 
Cocks his chiny and figures in^ 

To tabor^ fife^ and flute. 


Come then dance and ftng^ 

While all Barbadoes bells jhall ringy ^c, 

K - Chorus, 



Since, thus^ each anxious care 
Js vaniJJyd into empty air^ 
Ah ! how can I forbear 

^fo foi'ri the jocund dance? 
To and fro^ couples go^ 
On ihc light fantojuc toe^ 
JV:nle with glee^ inerrily^ 

Jhe rojy hours advance^ ^Chorus, 

Y A R I C 0. 

When firft the fiveUing fea 
Hither bore my hue andine^ 
Wrjai then -my fate would be^ 

Little did 1 think— 
Doomed to knovj care and zvoe^ 
Mar f>y f till is Tarico % 
Since her love zvill con ft ant prove ^ 

And nobly f corns to fir ink. 

Trudge. - 

^Sbohs I noiv Pm fx' d for Ufe^ 

My fortune' s fair tho' black' s my wife^ 

Who fears donufiic Jirij e — 

Who cares novj a Jowf I 
Ii4erry cheer ?ny dingy dear 
Shall find^ with her Fa^totu?n here ; 
Night and duv., P II frifi and play^ 

About the houjc^ ivith I'^ows. Chorus. 

P AT T y. 



Let Patty fay a wor d • < 

A chambermaid may Jure he hear d \ : 

Sure men are grown abfurd^ 

Thus taking black for white ! 
21? hug and kifs a dingy mifs^ 
Will hardly fuit an age like this 
IJnleJSy her fame friends appear^ 

Who Like this wedding night. Chorus ;